by Amy Odell

Make expensive fashion purchases. If you’re going to buy a new coat that costs $400, you are definitely not going to do it in a friend vacuum.

1. Use the bathroom at parties.

And if it’s one of those parties where you just HAVE to talk about the people there or is just really scary, you are absolutely dragging at least one of your friends into the bathroom with you and pulling the whole “turn around while I pee” move. (You think this will stop after the age of 23, but no, it doesn’t.)

2. Walk to the water cooler at the office.

It’s so far away. It takes so much time to fill up your cup. The only upside to the whole process is that it gives you so much uninterrupted time to talk to Patsy about that girl who’s driving you crazy and that ass hole Jared who’s loud and worthless and why does no one see that but the two of you?!

3. Try new workout classes.

There’s so much to figure out. Where are the lockers? Do you need your own lock? Do they wear shoes? Why are some people wearing socks and some people aren’t wearing anything on their feet at all?! It’s just better to have someone you trust nearby to get you through all these scary questions.

4. Brunch.

You can grab dinner alone, you can grab lunch alone, but you can never, ever brunch alone.

5. Award shows.

If a woman watches an award show without four friends and three bottles of white wine, did the award show even happen? (Predominant anthropological opinion at the time of this writing is NO.)

6. Make expensive fashion purchases.

If you’re going to buy a new coat that costs $400, you are definitely not going to do it in a friend vacuum. You are going to grab the two ladies who enable 90 percent of your clothing purchases, drag them to the store, and then leave with the coat and a new pair of leather gloves.

7. Trying the latest dessert fad.

Cronuts, mini-cupcakes, hot chocolate that’s so thick it makes a Pepperidge Farm Pirouette stand upright — these treats are the glue that invisibly yet inextricably binds X chromosomes around the nation.

8. Fro yo.

Getting fro yo alone is like drinking alone. You could go there, but no one really wants that.

9. Make life-changing haircut decisions.

Most often this happens in a mass text with rapid transmission of headshots of Jessica Alba. Somehow, your friends always unite on an answer.

10. Go to Vegas.

Going to Vegas without your girls is like rolling in fish guts and jumping into an aquarium tank full of sharks. Bringing your ladies to that terrifying place is really about survival above all else.

11. Summer music festivals.

If you’re going to spend the day wearing a crown made of daisies and dancing in a bikini top, you’ll definitely need more than one fellow female as like-minded “this ridiculous activity is OK and FUN!” reinforcement.

12. Meet someone’s boyfriend for the first time.

Putting a new significant other before a court of one is just a waste of time. You need the full jury present so all can unite on a ruling (which is that he’s ~*PeRfEcT~*~).

13. Dinner with parents who are in town.

To finally fulfill all those drunken promises of “u shud rly meet my parents guyz!!!”

14. Getting a 4 o’clock sugar fix.

15. Deciding whether you want the Twix or the Kettle Cornersor just a green apple once you reach the newsstand where you will purchase your 4 o’clock sugar fix.

16. Choose a restaurant.

Because you know everyone is secretly harshly judged on their restaurant choices.

17. Internet-stalking guys.

Otherwise known as “how many of my girls can fit into a GChat at one time.”

18. Book club.

Not because you have to talk about the book, but because award shows only happen every so often which means you need to build excuses to get together and gossip over white wine at someone’s apartment into your weekly/monthly routine.

19. Get ready to get married.

This is just Girl Law: thou shalt not get hair and makeup done before walking down the aisle without a gaggle of giggling girly girls freaking out all around you.

20. Pregame.

Otherwise known as, the only time you can socially acceptably wear a freakum dress while watching that Beyoncé DVD

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Read more in Cosmopolitan

 

Op-ed pieces and contributions are the opinions of the writers only and do not represent the opinions of Y!/YNaija.