Akerele Oluranti: Begin your long walk to freedom [Nigerian Voices]

by Akerele Oluranti

I started out life as a nondescript kid. One who never did home works; hardly knew a thing in school; the carry first from back child, slow and sluggish to the uttermost. My big break came in Primary 5, when I answered a question in class. The previous day, my dad made me read a book: Trial of Jimmy Johnson by Sly Edaghese. There I met the word “Septuagenarian”. The next day, with bated breath I watched my teacher, Mr Emmanuel , tear into the class because no one knew the meaning of the word. His body convulsed in rage as he brandished his weapon (a cane) in our already teary-eyed faces, his over-sized white shirt seem to make a moving scarecrow of him. After about a full minute of ranting, scared and shy, I raised my hand. Half expecting me to misfire and half amazed it was me, he motioned to me. I stood up shakily, spelled the word and gave the meaning. Out of shock or surprise – I couldn’ t tell them apart- he ordered the class to give me a resounding applause. Everyone happily clapped and cheered. I had saved the day, and this has to be my finest hour, yet. One moment I cherished and wanted a repeat. Then I started gathering literature books from everywhere. I knew new words, I started out on my long walk to freedom. I was, in fact, on my way to becoming an intelligent intellectual .

Puto ita scribo I think, therefore I write
Puto ita scribo
I think, therefore I write

Ultimately, I knew I was going to succumb to the well researched fact that just like love, our quest for knowledge far exceeds what we can get because we are insatiable beings. In retrospect, award-winning Zimbabwean writer, NoViolet Bulawayo captured the nee d for a re-invention of the self in “We Need New Names.” I envied the pragmatism she employed in the story. The title depicts a milestone on the road to self discovery – the long walk to freedom.

I’m a pragmatist, an optimist and a futurist with a thought process exclusively tuned to the future. I have a firm belief in the self, i.e the belief that everything you need to get ahead in life lies right inside you. As humans, we try to rely on our life’s participants and circumstances for safety, security and self-worth, but all of those things are found from within.

More often than not, I do not engage in motivational books nor do I attend life coaching seminars and all of that. I believe those should be at best, an addendum to the self- motivated person. Why? I’ll explain what I call “SuperAkerele’s theory of diminishing intent”

Sometimes, these life coaches and seminarians are sourced and invited to do what they know how to do best – show you the secret of success, right? Now, you’re seated in the hall, listening with gusto to how this man achieved so much with perhaps so little. You’re as fired up as much as he wants you to, given the right doses of theatrics he employs. You have this illusionary belief that once outside this hall, you’re ready to conquer the entire universe – bcause no, Napoleon didn’t do enough. You just need to step out of this hall – the only thing holding you back from achieving your dreams is the usher at the entrance who wouldn’t let you disrupt or distract other participants by leaving. So you sit still, the man at the podium reels off quotes with mind- blowing alliterations that hit you at the right places.  You’re vulnerable, he is well rehearsed. You watch with dreamy eyes and an awed countenance – this man has to be My Lord and Saviour they spoke about, if only I could touch the hem of his garment.

Finally, he’s rounding off, he probably drops a fe w complimentary cards for mentees of which you’re already his ‘forst born’. The food served means nothing at that point, but you don’t like food wastage, so you wait for it. You’re ready to take the world by the scruff of its collar. As you leave this hall, you’re the next best thing that ever happened to mankind, after Calvary. At this stage, I say you’re “possessed by the CAN-DO spirit”. You tell everyone that cares to listen: “men and brethren, WE CAN DO!”

The next day, you sleep and wake up to no electricity, no money in your bank akant, your GP is low, your relationship/marriage is still as comatose and jerky as ever, your business is sunk in debt, your finances are dwindling, your whole world needs that ‘hem of his garment’ touch. You’re slipping into despair, but no, the keynote speaker from yesterday couldn’t be wrong. You start your day with a tinge of positivity, but as the day wear on, you burn out slowly but surely. You close the day with the same harsh, spiky realities you started it with, maybe even worse. You tell your inner circle: “men and brethren, CAN WE DO?”

From then on, life didn’t give you a breather, you got more hits and plummeted into the abyss of despondence. Your belief, whipped up at the seminar to get as high as the Empire State now records a new level of disgraceful depth, summarily you succumb to: “men and brethren, WE CAN’T DO!”

What next? Attend another seminar and repeat process? I think not.

This last stage is what I’m being bullish about. Those moments when your heart is convulsed with pain too deep to know any mirth; when the burdens press and the cares distress; when the days are weary and the nights become long and dreary.

The long walk to freedom is a charge, a war cry, a subtle clarion call to the journey of self – discovery and being your own muse while you’re at it. To be your own muse entails more than paying lip service to whatever precipitated your search of a muse. An unsavoury experience, could be disappointment, academic somersault, a failed relationship wherein you invested a lot of time and emotional energy. Really bad that you have exerted so much, it left you completely drained and exhausted to the uttermost. You’d crossed all the lines and broke all the rules. You swore never to go near any of such mentally unnerving misadventures as your most recent experience as it could be best described as a fantastic effort in futility. The thing you thought was,  wasn’t. The thing you thought clicked, clicked not. The thing you hoped for didn’t come through. Your ego is crushed, your hope is gone, the last candlelight of hope just flickered into nothingness.

But finally there is something to work with – the wisps of soot, you’ll need them to start out on your long walk to freedom.

By starting out on your long walk to freedom is an subliminal acknowledgement of your current state. Regardless of what the seminarians and authors tell you about not accepting defeat – I think there’s no greater place than the place of surrender. You should learn to use surrender tactic to transform weakness into strength. In the place of surrender – here, you’re pliable, malleable, bendable and teachable – these are your greatest advantages in getting an ultimate healing, because when you reach the end of yourself, the big break happens. Your walk to freedom would be a lonely, tiresome, torturous journey, but it is all shades of worthy – you owe it to yourself, you are your own elixir, everything good will come.

All these lines tell you the story of who I am, so many stories of whe re I’ve been and how I got to whe re I am. But these stories don’t mean anything, when you’ve got no one to tell them to. I’ve got you, my story means a lot.

Here’s to God, my Chief muse and eternal support system…

Here’s to you reading this, going through thorns and thistles and burns and bristles …

Here’s to you enduring sticks and stones, deprived of steaks and scones…

Here’s to you surviving through the severest weather possible as surviving is the only option life’s served you…

Here’s to you trying to get ahead in this maze called life…

And, here’s to SuperAkerele – my elixir, even when I was dead broke, you made me feel like a million bucks, I was made for you.


This entry was submitted as part of the Nigerian Voices competition organized by YNaija.com.

We publish, un-edited, Nigerians telling the stories of their everyday lives. Read all the narratives daily on the Nigerian Voices vertical. You can also contribute your own story titled ‘Nigerian Voices’ to [email protected].

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