by Charles Novia 

This is what I would draft for him in his next broadcast: 

Fellow Nigerians,

 With all humility, I address you once again in the light of the on-going nationwide protests. In the past few days, our beloved nation has been on tenterhooks, with my personality and my programs for the people constantly pilloried and blatantly abused by millions of Nigerians worldwide. I have watched in horror, the genuine protests on television and received security reports on the state of the nation. I must admit that the vehemence of your protests against the fuel subsidy removal has opened my eyes to the reality of the present conditions of the average Nigerian, for whom I thought the deregulation policy would benefit in the long run, in the first instance!  

Being in the corridors of power all the years of my political career and even now as your President, one is surrounded by a coterie of advisers and political jobbers. It is at times difficult to discern who among such have genuine intentions for the people, juxtaposed with their self-serving interests! I now know that I have been a victim of their deliberate insulation of my good intentions for all Nigerians. Though the buck stops on my table, I make bold to confess that I was misled by my team on the timing and even the implementation of the deregulation policy. I never reckoned with the humongous distrust the people have for the government, which even precedes my administration but which has been amplified since I was sworn in as your President. I feel the power of your protests and in the interest of the generality of Nigerians and with the utmost sincerity of purpose, I have decided to bow to the popular will of the people.  

I hereby order the immediate reversal of the fuel pump price to the status quo ante as it was on December 31 2011, until further notice. Consultations, on a genuine foundation this time around, will be re-initiated with all interest groups, before any other action on this deregulation policy will be taken.

 My fellow Nigerians, I have erred in a magnification above your expectations of me. However, I am humble enough to ask for your forgiveness and in the same vein, I stretch out my hand of fellowship to you all in rebuilding the destroyed public trust. I will immediately carry out reforms in the outrageous emoluments of public officials, including those of the National Assembly, who though pitched their tent with your noble demands, are not in anyway insulated from the opprobrium over their own profligacy. 

Give me another chance to prove myself to you. Remember that Nigeria is bigger than any one of us, least of all me.  

May God bless Nigeria.