Look before you leap: 10 signs she’ll be a ‘Jezebel’ wife

by DFTM

 

Love alone is not enough to make a marriage work, and certain characteristics are warning signs for a troubled marriage down the road. Here are some of the most obvious signs that your girlfriend is not marriage material.

If you’re thinking of asking your girlfriend to become your wife, deciding if you’re ready to make the commitment to marriage is only half the battle. You have to be absolutely sure that the woman in your life is someone you’ll be happy spending time with day in and day out. Love alone is not enough to make a marriage work, and certain characteristics are warning signs for a troubled marriage down the road. Here are some of the most obvious signs that your girlfriend is not marriage material.

1. She cuts you off from loved ones
A girlfriend who always becomes sick when it’s time to spend quality time with your family and even forbids you from hanging out with your friends will only act worse after you say your vows.

2. She bails on you when times get tough
Life isn’t always a bowl of cherries, but that doesn’t mean that the woman in your life should just disappear when the times get tough. If your girlfriend is not supportive of you emotionally through difficult times and only stands by you when things are going good, she’s not the one you should be walking down the aisle with.

3. She displays psychotic behaviors

A woman who breeds chaos, misunderstanding and insanity might not be the best person to swear your undying loyalty to. If she displays severe psychological problems now, imagine what kind of influence her crazy and irrational behaviors will have on your future. Marrying a woman like this will most likely ruin your life and your perception of women forever.

4. She’s too clingy
If your girlfriend can’t go anywhere or do anything without you, calls you twenty times a day and destroys any chance of you missing her because because the two of you are never apart, she’s going to make a bad wife.

5. She has nothing going on for herself

You should want to marry a woman who has goals and brings something better to your life, not one who is up to her neck in debt, has no income, displays unpredictable behaviors and has tried numerous, short-lived career paths yet never knows what she wants in life. This type of fickle lifestyle could derail your own life plan as well.

6. She’s controlling
If your girlfriend controls all of your conversations, constantly forces you into agreeing with her and acts as an overbearing, emotional bully, it’ll only get worse after you say “I do.”

7. She’s already cheated on you
Do you honestly believe that a woman is marriage material if she has been unfaithful to you while you were dating? Yes, a person can always change and learn from their mistakes; however, a cheating girlfriend will more than likely continue to be unfaithful after marriage.

8. Her libido doesn’t match yours
Another sign that she’ll make a bad wife is if her libido differs wildly from yours. The way you relate to each other in the bedroom has a big influence on whether the two of you will stay together after wedding vows are exchanged, so it’s best to work this out before you walk down the aisle.

9. She’s extremely jealous
Although a little bit of jealousy is essential for a healthy relationship, extreme jealousy arises in a relationship because of high levels of insecurity. If your girlfriend is jealous of every girl who comes near you, refuses to accept that you have female friends and feels threatened when you discuss your previous relationships, putting a ring on her finger is not going to make her more secure.

10. She can’t admit when she’s wrong
If she always seems to have the upper hand in arguments, refuses to admit her faults or even treat you as an equal, she’s not the marrying kind.

 

Op-ed pieces and contributions are the opinions of the writers only and do not represent the opinions of Y!/YNaija.

Comments (7)

  1. All the author of this article is trying to say is if a woman should possess not one but few of this qualities together, she makes a bad combo for a wife

  2. I agree with the author, there's nothing wrong with anything he / she has written.

    #1. The key word there is 'forbids' you to spend time with loved ones. You intend to start a family, that doesn't mean you ignore the one you started with. A lady who does that is trouble!!!

    #2. A woman who can't stay with you when the going gets tough, will definitely get going when you say 'I do'.

    #3. A woman who has a mild and friendly spirit, shouldn't have an issue with this. I'm one and don't see anything unreasonable with this.

    #4. 'Too' clingy spells 'gross' insecurity on anyone. Don't even try it, with a guy or a girl.

    #5. 'Nothing' going on for herself?! Like seriously?! That's a lazy woman. How's she supposed to be a helpmeet when she isn't able to help herself.

    #6. She's controlling? Please that's obvious witchcraft. I mean, why will anyone (male or female) 'constantly force' someone to agree with them; and then act as overbearing bullies? What else is there to wait for? Please wise up and run for your life!

    #7 & #8. I really don't understand why people can't save this till marriage vows are exchanged. I mean, you've got the rest of your life after marriage for that. After expending all your passion before "I do", there's nothing left post "I do". So just chill, you've got it all ahead.

    #9. Excuse me, it's not 'jealous' the author wrote, but 'extremely jealous'. Anything 'extreme' will most likely be unhealthy.

    #10. If she can't admit her wrong and also apologise, you're in for a lot of blames and nagging, when you make her your wife. It's that simple.

    On a final note, sticking to God's prescription for marriage is just "IT". Don't settle for less, cos you deserve the best.

  3. Well said to some extent but most Nigerian women these days have a couple or so of these attributes. But men should always remember women will always be women. Finding a near perfect one with just one of the attributes mentioned is like looking for a needle in a haystack. I'm yet to find one, my sisters inclusive. So what do we do? Not get married at all??? Naaa. Life goes on and that's why we're men.

  4. Well,I think the writer has little or no idea bout marriage or choosing a mate,from his accessment he sounds like someone who has totally lost his path.#1 is so wrong if a man doesn't make adjustment after marriage how wil he stay married?#3 totally unreasonable #4 a man wud leave his father and mother and stink to his wife and they wud become one flesh so wats wrong wit being clingy? #5 shows u r selfish u ve nothing to offer #8 shows u r a fornicator with no fear of God.that's y u failed to mention a Godfearing woman is one of the important ingredient. Guys be careful of all these garbage called articles on the internet

  5. well said, but I don't think there's any girl not having at least one of these attributes. Who then are we to marry?

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