Omar Farouq: The youth in crisis [NEW VOICES]

by Omar Farouq

I would never forget the day I left America to come back home to Nigeria. The 15th of August 2015 would forever be stuck in thoughts with my childish ways of throwing tantrums. I felt like I was in mourning which I was because America was life and I was losing it. I despised the fact I was coming back to Nigeria, which ironically is the home that I say I love but sulking felt like a reflex reaction. I am sure most people who stay abroad can relate to this statement. The bizarre thoughts of thinking I would rather be a 2nd class citizen in the white man’s land than to come home still lingers from time to time.

The moving back actually became a massive crisis because I was so influenced by the western world.  The influence overpowered my culture leaving me confused with self-identity. This is the problem many of us face who lived abroad. Our brain develops with life experiences and what happens around us so it’s somehow expected. It’s like when we see our white friends talk to their mothers whichever they want, we also start to think that we can pull that off and get away with it.  It’s behaviour like this that has made Nigerian parents go into frenzies with their children and rightfully so. My mother actually told me the other day that mothers are going to their pastors to pray for their children. They feel that they have turned out to be monsters who have lost their morals and home trained decency.

I heard a story the other day about my friend’s younger brother that had me in such shock. The boy got angry with his dad because he wasn’t allowed to go out with his friends. The courageous but stupid teen took off his shirt and told his dad if he wanted to fight and take this outside then he is ready. It was either that or his father can watch him walk out the front door. First of all when did children start giving parents options to choose from? The audacity of the generation today is indefinable but yet again some parents are to blame when allowing their children to take advantage and cross the line.

Another example was at dinner a few weeks ago. I witnessed the way my 17-year-old cousin was speaking to his mother. I felt so awkward because it was unapologetically rude but at the same time I somehow saw my old self in him. It made me question a lot about myself like who the hell did I think I was? as I glanced at him noticing his body language/attitude. The once again entitlement of coming from a family that worked hard to get to where they are. On the other hand was little old me expecting the same treatment they wanted when I had done nothing to deserve it.

I was so used to this privileged lifestyle that I feel looking back I personally didn’t deserve; like my iPhone or the idea or the not having a job and demanding allowance. The danger of allowance is that it decreases the chances of being ambitious because I felt l didn’t need to work if I was getting money already.

At the age of 25 now, I had come to realise that I was a loser. I couldn’t do anything for myself. The fact that I am the youngest made me  a mummy’s boy as I sat down to watch everyone run and sweat to get things done for me. I am however glad to say I look at things differently now and I have become the most ambitious I have ever been.

At the age of 18 our English friends are left out in the world to dry and make something of themselves. This rule should also apply to Nigerians when it comes to allowance to give us a chance to grow up quicker and smell the coffee. The fact that I even threw tantrums to come home to free food, free driver and almost free everything is amusing. I blamed my family for making me come back and not letting me stay abroad. Let’s be honest, if this is what my attitude was like a year ago then thank God I came back when I did before I turned any worse.


Omar-Farouk, 25, has a Bachelor’s in Drama/Creative Writing for Kingston University London and a Master’s in Acting for Film in New York and Los Angeles. He has a few short stories and poetry under his belt, as well as IMDB credits for two American movies. He also landed a scene in Nigerian production, The CEO and is presently building his personal magazine.

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