Opinion: What do AfroCandy and porn have in common?

by Vera Ezimora

(Discretion: Some readers may find the image below disurbing)

Nothing.

It was only after watching the video that I realized it was AfroCandy, not Cossy.

And that’s why this porn movie is all kinds of confusing. We first met AfroCandy in 2010 when she released her song, Ikebe Na Money. Back then, we thought it was the most ridiculous thing ever. If only we knew what was coming next. Now in hindsight, I guess it shouldn’t be too surprising because she was almost naked in the music video anyway.

AfroCandy’s new movie is called Destructive Instinct 3 & 4. I’m assuming that Destructive Instinct 1 & 2 is floating around somewhere. When I first came across the “trailer” for this “movie,” I just assumed that it was Cossy. She’s the one who goes above and beyond to show us her yansh and tell us that she doesn’t care what we think. Really, I don’t care either.

AfroCandy in one of her scenes

AfroCandy in one of her scenes

 

Afrocandy herself

Afrocandy herself

 

It was only after watching the video that I realized it was AfroCandy, not Cossy. The movie has AfroCandy baring breasts and ass and doing things on camera that she really shouldn’t be doing. You don’t need to watch the movie to know that it has no plot; the trailer does a good job of conveying that over and over. The lighting, sound, acting, set … SUCKS. The sex sucks, too. Did anyone actually get turned on by this thing?

The thing about porn and Nollywood (although Nollywood would probably distance itself from this movie, as it really should) is that we (Nigerians) have not quite mastered the act of pretend love making. I mean, we have not mastered how to act the love making scene. Love/sex scenes in Nigerian movies are usually just loud, awkward, funny, and unbelievable. It usually involves strange noises and faces that look like they are either defecating or in extreme pain, none of which is sexy to listen to or look at.

I watched the preview twice because I think I may have passed out the first time. I cannot put the video of the trailer up here because it just has too much nudity. However, if you are that interested in seeing it, then you can do so here.

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Vera Ezimora writes at VERASTIC

Op-ed pieces and contributions are the opinions of the writers only and do not represent the opinions of Y!/YNaija

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