I sit down on a Friday Night/Saturday Morning wondering why I wasn’t out parting hard with my peeps, then it hit me with a severe stab of pain. I can’t go out tonight because my right knee is playing up and for some odd reason, in the last few days, I can’t put my left down without feeling a jab of pain that I am now forced to limp yet again. Me and my wahala dem. I carry plenty for body sha and you know I haven’t been to see my doctor. It’s is going to take awhile before I do that.

Living in England makes Healthcare so easy and simply unlike the Americans, we have that wonderful service called the NHS (National Health Service) but still; Aninoritse will not go to the doctors when she has a problem, simply because SHE DOESN’T LIKE DOCTORS. So you know I will stomach this pain for as long as I can, till I can take no more. Why am I telling you about my dodgy health? I have no idea why, but it explains why i’m home on a Friday Night writing this article and it also this takes me to a discussion with my friend earlier this evening.

I had stumbled on an article recently about a Gay 65year old Vicar who was going to marry his 25year old Nigerian Boyfriend. I cracked up so hard. I hadn’t laughed that way in a long time, it was just too funny. Now what did I see that was funny? Well it just had to be a Nigerian didn’t it? It just had to be my fellow country man trying to hustle for that passport sha. My first thoughts were “Ha Naija boy hustler to the bone.”It is well known that a Nigerian will do anything and I mean anything to get out of Nigeria and “Make it” in a foreign land. After I had a good laugh at their expense, I rang my very good friend and we began to talk about this Gay story and he laughed and reiterated my points about the boy being a Nigerian. Now please understand this, we are not making fun of the fact that this couple are indeed Gay. We are laughing at the fact that the young toy boy is Nigerian and we feel he is in a relationship with the Papa simply because he wants a passport. I believe we would do the same thing and poke the same amount of fun if it were a straight couple at the centre of it. I am pointing this out because when I posted the story to Facebook, somebody sent me a message and accused me of mocking the couple. I say it again; I will poke the same amount of fun and yes, believe it or not. I do understand the concept of Gay Love.

My dear friend and I continue to talk about issues affecting Gays and why people do what they do. Gay Racism. Ever heard of this? Me neither. I never really knew what it entails or how it would happen but believe me, it does and it exists. As we know the subject of being Gay is a taboo especially in the Nigerian community. If you are gay, you stay in that closet of yours and never come out. You are expected to conform to society. Why do you think a lot of Africans and Asians come to the UK and act free? Here you can be who you want to be right? Err it appears not. You still have issues on the racism, so imagine combining being Black and Gay. That is a baggage of hatred people. A lot of hatred.

My friend emailed me some stories over the weekend and I’ll post an excerpt: We live in a country that is predominantly white and straight, however the world has changed. This is something we all have to get to grips with. People of all colours have helped to put the ‘Great’ in Britain over hundreds of years from Asia to the Caribbean and this shouldn’t be forgotten, especially by white LGBT people. When you’re the only black face in a room of 20 people, it is not your sexuality that others see first, but the colour of your skin. There is no closet to come out of. If there is going to be a debate on black LGBT issues, then it at least needs to be a real and intelligent one, based on facts not myths – Kevin Maxwell.

So how does one deal with this? I am a young Black woman and I still get judged by the colour of my skin or by my name. So after reading these stories, I do for a moment sympathize with that 25year old Nigerian boy in a relationship with the Vicar. For I am sure that it is not easy to be Young, Black and Gay or is it?

Oluwapelumi