Submission seems to be a sensitive issue because many perceive it as a way for men to dominate women. Those who speak against it say that it requires women to shut off their voices and behave like children while their husbands dictate the course of their lives. Other believe that submission is misunderstood and is actually a two way street where both spouses submit to one another and submit to God.

In recent years there have been a lot of people who say that, while submission may have been good for past generations, it is outdated and unrealistic for modern marriages. Others argue that the decline in the success rate of marriages is because submission is being valued less and less.

We asked the question, “What is the value and relevance of submission in modern day marriages?” on our Facebook Page and the responses are as follows: ( Feel free to respond to the question yourself.)

“Our families are in disarray. Submission is one of the factors necessary to bring back much needed order in black [families] ”

“It depends on the dynamic of the union. If the wife is not working and the husband pays for everything, submission is more valued. If the wife works and deal with as much or more stress of life as her husband, she is more prone to want and expect to be treated as a equal.”

“I think submission is sometimes manipulated.. True submission is a two way street a husband submits to the desires of his wife and vice versa.. Love makes it easy. However there needs to be a head.. A decision maker and a trusted advisor.. Either way man or woman usually the advisory is the one that makes the decision. The head is just the face of it.. Most guys I know that love and trust their wives include them in all decisions. So it may look like he is the boss but really they are a team and if you ask him he will tell you.. Money has nothing to do with it. That is where the problem is.. Couple wanna equate money with leadership…”

“Submission (compromise) is still a valued component of marriages, even today. Without submission, from both husband and wife, the marriage will end up in turmoil and disarray.”

Based on the answers, it seems that submission is still valued. It seems that an argument can be made that when submission is spoken of, sometimes the people speaking about it have not entirely understood it and are speaking about their perception of it, which may not be accurate.

– Black Blue Dog