Every day on the Nigerian internet, there are people who keep our eyes glued to our phone screens as we read their rants, opinions, perspectives on political and social matters, etc. Sometimes, they are even just downright ridiculous. We make it our job to take down the names of these noisemakers.
Here’s our list from today:
1 Donald Trump
President of the United States, Donald Trump, signed an executive order on the 27th of January, prohibiting refugees from seven countries from making their abode in the States. Specifically, the order suspended all refugees from entering the US for 120 days, barred visa applications from seven countries with Muslim majorities for 90 days, and refugees from Syria indefinitely. This caused a ruckus around the country and even outside of it: protests were held at airports in America, and #MuslimBan went viral, and some states sued the federal government.
Today, federal judge James Robart of Washington ruled against the ban. His ruling applies nationwide.
President was upset about the ruling and tweeted this:
The opinion of this so-called judge, which essentially takes law-enforcement away from our country, is ridiculous and will be overturned!
— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) February 4, 2017
And the responses rolled in:
.@realDonaldTrump So do you not know what "checks and balances" means or do you just not care? I genuinely don't know which is worse #RESIST
— Danielle Muscato (@DanielleMuscato) February 4, 2017
Oh to be referred to as a 'so-called judge' by a man that's never paid tax, bankrupts everything & forces himself on women.
— Tommy Campbell (@MrTommyCampbell) February 4, 2017
There’s actually more here. Feed your eyes.
But that did not stop Trump from enlarging on his previous comment.
See below:
We must keep "evil" out of our country!
— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) February 3, 2017
Trust Chrissy Teigen to package and deliver the perfect clapback:
what time should we call your Uber?
— christine teigen (@chrissyteigen) February 4, 2017
We live for these bants.
2 CBN governor, Godwin Emefiele
Bringing it back to our Fatherland, one of our government officials, whom many have described as incompetent and responsible for our now three-quarter economic recession surprised us today.
Using the official CBN Twitter handle, he put out statements like these:
Yea. Dumb, right?
Without question.
So we were able to make a connection: Nigerians want Emefiele to go. This has been their desire since last year. But the CBN governor clearly doesn’t want to. So his backers at CBN (@cenbank), who are also handling the @EmefieleStays account got their handles mixed up and used the wrong Twitter account to post reasons why Emefiele should stay.
Hehe, when God wants to catch you.
This is what Nigerians thought about the accident.
4 James Ibori
Our favourite con man is back. The former governor of Delta State, James Ibori, has returned to the country after duly serving his jail term abroad for fraud. He received a hero’s welcome, which got a few persons upset on Twitter NG:
The people's thief is home. Oh what a rogue. pic.twitter.com/a38ewp0UGo
— Mallam Battycash (@Batarhe) February 4, 2017
What a sad day to be a Nigerian! Criminal & convicted felon James Ibori given a triumphant reception today by those whose resources he stole pic.twitter.com/2oJOKh6szy
— Inibehe Effiong (@InibeheEffiong) February 4, 2017
https://twitter.com/elnathan_john/status/827970156731183104
There might be a bright side to his return, guys.
So the FG said it was going to launch its economic recovery plan in February and Ibori landed in Nigeria today. Coodibee…
— tyro (@DoubleEph) February 4, 2017
be looking for trouble o ?. Just remember there's now one empty cell somewhere
— Zeal Ak (@zeal_a) February 4, 2017
But think am – if he gets the militants to stop blowing pipelines and oil production goes up, no be recovery be that?
— tyro (@DoubleEph) February 4, 2017
And the people of God say…
— The Runner (@je_mc2) February 4, 2017
Ibori was picked up by the DSS when he came in. According to DSS boss, Daura, “He met me for a short debriefing session and way forward; also, to welcome him back to his fatherland. We are also meeting soon to discuss issues of interest affecting the nation,”
See, everybody loves Ibori.
5 Audu Maikori
Sadly, Audu Maikori was wrong. Not just about the pictures he used to gain sympathy for the #Southern Kaduna killing fields. But also about this story. When Twitter began to throw accusations at him, and call his stories false, Audu decided to fact check it. This is what he discovered.
But a number of people are taking his apology with a pinch of salt.
https://twitter.com/jag_bros/status/827959121760616448
Just imagine!! I'm just shocked!
How is it heroism when he kept denying he did wrong until he could no longer deny it? ??…. https://t.co/v51kLPqZ69— Dr Etin-osa Imagbenikaro (@etinmagbe) February 4, 2017
Na so na. If I want 1k RT now now now
1) Ask 4 forgiveness voting PMB
2) Suddenly remember GEJ achievements
3) Plummet PMB
?
— Ade Of Nigeria (@Hammdriller) February 4, 2017
Moving on…
6 Toke Makinwa
So the great Toke is flicking her hair in Maje’s direction, not ’cause she’s flirting with him; she just won’t give a damn about his lawsuit.
She is currently in Ghana promoting the book.
7 Japhet Omojuwa
Hardly a day passes without Omojuwa calling out one person or the other, from the Federal government to Twitter trolls. Today, he turned his sights on Reno Omokri who wrote this article.
Reno Omokri: Jonathan’s prophecy, Buhari’s heresy and Tuface’s bravery https://t.co/iTbgTWFVQY pic.twitter.com/w4rFclzdl9
— Y! Online #WorldCup (@YNaija) February 4, 2017
This fool again! He managed to Join 2Face to his primary intention of sounding stupid! https://t.co/0RIaOB2MxE
— JJ. Omojuwa (@Omojuwa) February 4, 2017
The desperation by snakes like Fayose and Omokri Wendell Simlin to hijack the Monday #IStandWithNigeria protest is sickening.
— JJ. Omojuwa (@Omojuwa) February 4, 2017
Some persons agreed:
Reno is still very bitter that his looting agenda was cut short by Gej's defeat. https://t.co/fT7fALGAYa
— Mr Ossie! (@francis_osita) February 4, 2017
Reno Omokri will always and forever be a waste man. NEVER JONATHAN. Get it through your thick skull. https://t.co/H4I0sVr68r
— Damilola Oyedele (@DamiOyedele) February 4, 2017
Of course, there were those who didn’t quite care for Omojuwa’s choice of words:
@YNaija Omojuwa you are the fool for calling someone like Reno a fool.
— Kelechi (@kc4glory) February 4, 2017
crass display of animosity, how would u open ur odoriferous mouth to call @renoomokri a fool
— Chika Ezeh (@iamjayq) February 4, 2017
@YNaija I'm so disappointed you can make use of such language on social media. I held you in high esteem, but with this. ..
— KingAniche (@FelixNwabiani) February 4, 2017
https://twitter.com/BiafraOrDeath2/status/827912774814670849
These angry children of Twitter, sha.
And that wraps up our list of noisemakers for this week. See you Monday.
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