by Tope Olofin

I am on the verge of assuming that very soon there will be more mobile phones than there are human beings, especially in the Nigerian environment. This seems like a worthy assertion Nigerians possess more than one phone. Initially, the trend was one smartphone and a dumb one, now it is 3 or 4 smartphones.

With the dumb phones, I think life was pretty easy. But the smart ones just had to come along and change the rules of engagement. I know my brain tends to go into overdrive a lot and I began to wonder, what if the smartphones have rules or laws for us humans.

 

Commandment 9: Thou shalt not commit network adultery aka, I don port!

 

Well if they did, this is what it would look like.

Commandment 1: Thou shalt have internet service activated, if thy intentions are to fully exploit the use of any smartphone.

Commandment 2: Thou shalt not hack Blackberry Internet Service. All the Nigerian Telecommunication companies will eventually catch up with you. That’s me speaking from experience…lol!

Commandment 3: Thou shalt not take the low battery status lightly. Once the batteries goes flat. Smartphones become insignificant to the ecosystem.

Commandment 4: Remember thy charger and thy power bank to keep it handy.

Commandment 5: Honor thy chat applications, especially Blackberry Messenger and WhatsApp. A cost effective method of keeping in touch.

Commandment 6: Thou shalt not steal thy neighbor’s DP (Display Picture)

Commandment 7: Spam (Broadcast messages) thy neighbor as thyself.

Commandment 8: Thou shalt take selfies. In this day and age, who doesn’t?

Commandment 9: Thou shalt not commit network adultery aka, I don port!

Commandment 10: ….you tell me –p!

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Tope Olofin loves to rant. She is a boisterous and hilarious English graduate from the University of Lagos. She believes life’s experiences are priceless and the best way to capture it is by writing. She blogs atwww.toperants.com and tweets @toperants

 

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