Every day on the Nigerian internet, there are people who keep our eyes glued to our phone screens as we read their rants, opinions, perspectives on political and social matters, etc. Sometimes, they are just downright ridiculous. We make it our job to take down the names of these noisemakers.
Here’s our list from today:
1 Kemi Lewis
8th July, 2017
Dear July
It was all madness today in Lekki as roads turned unmanageable rivers and everything on wheels got stuck. The lamentations from Island living Lagosians tormented social media.
2. Folarin was also a victim
https://twitter.com/Fallering/status/883635682681528320
Eromo sympathises
Sorry fam. Hakeem Dickson is in top 3 worst roads on the island. Stop at XStranger and chill abeg. https://t.co/jqqmwiBKmk
— Eromo Egbejule (@EromoEgbejule) July 8, 2017
Lekki is flooded yes. But if Ozumba is this bad, I'm afraid to ask about VGC people.
— Ebuka Obi-Uchendu (@Ebuka) July 8, 2017
3. Adeyinka
Hey, but it wasn’t all bad. Look at this. What other opportunity would he have to catch a Croc? A freaking Croc!
@Gidi_Traffic @cchukudebelu …caught during flood this morning Lekki Ajah road; metropolitan city becomes conservative garden? pic.twitter.com/qNX79QjzDb
— Adeyina T. S. (@adeyinatolulope) July 8, 2017
What’s better than a Croc? This fresh fish
Someone just sent this to me on whatsapp.
Point and kill on the streets of Lekki today pic.twitter.com/phKEQskPi6
— ? DaddyMo PhD CEng ? (@officialdaddymo) July 8, 2017
Who’d have imagined?
4. Chydee
Spare a thought for all the flooded homes…
Or you could simply pray Chydee’s prayer:
Let us take a moment to pray for our friends in Lekki, before this flood moves them to Epe, or Cameroon. ? pic.twitter.com/QSnXJVcvoR
— Chidi Okereke (@Chydee) July 8, 2017
5. Doc C
Someone has to come out the winner in all this. Doc’s betting on:
Lagos mechanics looking at all the cars in the Lekki flood pic.twitter.com/9jMMMoGWLv
— Doc C (@tweetMOPOL) July 8, 2017
Always remember, there’s a price to pay for being a Lekki big girl or guy. Your landlord can explain:
When you rented house in Lekki during harmattan and you're trying to reach Oga landlord during rainy season. pic.twitter.com/yDoRV9hkmC
— Name: (@DamiElebe) July 7, 2017
6. Odunayo
Joining Odunayo to side eye all those Noahs who missed their call
I'm wondering who was supposed to build Ark in Lekki, but ignored God's call.
— Odunayo (@OdunEweniyi) July 8, 2017
SMH
7. Sir Andrew Alli warns against global warming
https://twitter.com/afalli/status/883590933010427904
8. Tolu Ogunlesi disputes it
Actually I think Lagos' flooding is largely 'drainage' flooding, not 'global-warming' flooding. This is rainwater, not lagoon/ocean water. https://t.co/z4AkG2WUoH
— tolu ogunlesi (@toluogunlesi) July 8, 2017
https://twitter.com/afalli/status/883639670252478464
Everybody weighs in
Any 50+ year old in Laos will tell you '7 days rain' is a yearly occurrence since they were kids.
— Kayode Abaniwonnda (@kabani2005) July 8, 2017
Yup. Standard stuff, in June/July. It was after the 1990 one that Raji Rasaki issued a 7-day quit notice to Maroko. The rest is history. https://t.co/ah6Vx5BeRo
— tolu ogunlesi (@toluogunlesi) July 8, 2017
So standard we were actually TAUGHT in primary school. 7-14day rain in July after which we had the famous "August Break".
— Zeal Ak (@zeal_a) July 8, 2017
Come quickly, August break.
9. Ross George
This is the crux of the matter:
Rainfall is different from flooding. Some flooding can be controlled. Lagos is developing without control.
— Ross Alabo-George (@imaginasion1) July 8, 2017
10. Douglas Imaralu
Give it up for Mainland peeps:
But the mainland is pretty dry…at least, where I am. https://t.co/9vueeR0vy6
— Douglas Imaralu (@jefumare) July 8, 2017
One unproven theory suggests the Lagos rain flooding dey target places based on per-capita SUV ownership. https://t.co/fJjiOmR3Wt
— tolu ogunlesi (@toluogunlesi) July 8, 2017
This is our fear:
Thinking Through:
The rains today in Lekki are a metaphor for the generation before us – as they depart the scene.
They laid extremely weak foundations.
— Onye Nkuzi (@cchukudebelu) July 8, 2017
Lagos is a state whose masterplan was dumped decades ago. Lekki is a city that grew out of a frenetic landgrab, not a plan.
— HENRY Okelue (@4eyedmonk) July 8, 2017
This is our future:
The Lekki floods will be forgotten in 2 weeks. Nothing will be done. Then it will happen again next year.
LOL. Nigeria is a funny country.
— Dr. Dipo Awojide (@OgbeniDipo) July 8, 2017
Press repeat.
Reformed social media monitoring spirit
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