Omonaikee: The diary of a converted Blackberry snob!


 by Omonike Odi

 I stared at her wondering if my contact list needed pruning too!

Every morning, as soon as I am conscious, my hands start groping for my blackberry,  my mother  became concerned and seven months ago, she staged an intervention about my “Blackberrylessness”!

She had been watching my anti- Blackberry campaign from a distance as she joined the rest of the sane, modern world and got hers. Things changed one day and I was informed that the matter had been decided and I was getting a blackberry. I had no say in the matter.

I once belonged to a high-class of Blackberry snobs who regarded the phone from a vantage point of righteous piety. People like me in that class get offended when you ask “What’s your PIN?

“Oh, I don’t have a Blackberry”, they will reply with an unmistakable hint of pride in their voice. And if you don’t press the issue, they will be disappointed at not getting the chance to repeat their worn out speech about how they want to remain untainted by the vanity plaguing the rest of the world who use the blackberry as a status symbol and want to “feel among”.

My line used to be that I had a broadband modem and I could log in and out of social media sites when I wanted and did not have to be plugged into them at the beck and call of every “Lagbaja” who liked my profile picture or every dry joke or lewd picture touring the internet.

 Asumpto, my fellow anti BB squad complained that it was  annoying to see someone almost fall into a ditch or get hit by a parked car just because they were busy chatting on their blackberry phones.

Another one, Yesmin brought to my attention the growing trend where guys didn’t ask for phone numbers anymore but were quick to ask for a PIN instead to avoid spending on credit cards. She referred to it as; “cheap toasting”

Then I got my own BlackBerry. I remember my brother made fun of me and laughed at how I must have bought the phone without the PIN and I needed to buy the PIN separately or get a spare part from Aba. Chei!

 The first thing that caught my attention was the red signal light that wouldn’t give up until I picked the phone. And soon enough I had to pick it up more times than a mother would pick her child that was suffering from colic. See wahala! Next were the incessant purple colored broadcasts! There were jokes that made me frown with disapproval, services advertised that I didn’t need and links that didn’t open. But it wasn’t all bad.

Last month I got a call from Asumpto asking for my PIN, I laughed really hard. Asumpto joked about how he had become a slave to every ping and beep from his phone and told me how happy he was to be able to access his emails on the go.

A week later, I got a BBM request from one “Yesmi sexy” and I didn’t spare Yesmin either. She was happy to put a new photo of herself on display every day but was considering pruning her BBM contact list to a healthy few. “The rest will need an audition and a gold ticket to get on my contact list” she said.

This time I didn’t laugh. I stared at her wondering if my contact list needed pruning too!

Omonike Odi is a freelance writer and a media content provider on all media platforms. Hang with her on her blog at where this week she interviews a very special guest check on it or follow her on twitter for daily inspirational quotes at or contact her – [email protected].

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