Every day, there are people who keep our eyes glued to our phone screens as we read their rants, opinions, perspectives on political and social matters, etc. Sometimes, they are even downright ridiculous. We make it our job to take down the names of these noisemakers.

Here’s our list from today:

 

1 P. Diddy

Yes, it’s 4 months to the end of the year and you are yet to make to a dent in those New Year goals, fret not, P. Diddy has some inspired words for you.

Be patient, God is preparing new blessings for you.

— Diddy (@Diddy) August 8, 2017

Amin o. We can’t wait.

2. Kenyans

Another set of people who can’t wait are the Kenyans. Today is the election that will decide who leads them for the next couple of years and they’ve resorted to creative ways to get their man:

Babies’ fingers inked after multiple parents use them to jump queues https://t.co/k6fYTam6BH #Ballot2017 pic.twitter.com/X1X6naQvd0

— Citizen TV Kenya (@citizentvkenya) August 8, 2017

https://twitter.com/kipronohoward/status/894986581626556417

?? AFRIKA!

— orwelliANDYstopia (@andyRoidO) August 8, 2017

Issa country ??

— HRH Adabekee? (@cremechic11) August 8, 2017

3. Deji Adeyanju

Deji teamed up with Charly Boy and other Nigerians to protest the continued absence of President Buhari. And the Nigerian police reacted. WATCH:

Over 120 policemen attacked about 10 of us. They used teargas, water cannon & dogs but there's NO GOING BACK.

We continue tomorrow. pic.twitter.com/Dz2zAo7htZ

— Adeyanju Deji ?? (@adeyanjudeji) August 8, 2017

Reactions:

This picture will go down in National memory as another example of Govt crackdown on peaceful protests in the 18th year of Democracy. pic.twitter.com/8T2Q8jInTM

— Demola Olarewaju (@DemolaRewaju) August 8, 2017

Dear @ProfOsinbajo, please handle with care. Tell Nigerian Police not to get overzealous. They should remain gentle. https://t.co/Lin2jFtWjA

— Bill Gates’ Maiguard (@knightofdelta) August 8, 2017

This is an unpopular protest, that is why wise and reasonable Nigerias didn't join you.we are ready to re-vote and re-vote PMB again n again

— Azeez Saka (@AzeezSaka7) August 8, 2017

This is thoroughly disgraceful and a slap on the face to everyone that voted for this govt.https://t.co/OU47SfQmuc

— ogbuanna (@OgbuAnna) August 8, 2017

Dispersing them with water canons is not disgraceful. It was a gathering of fools. I am dissapointed in Charly Boy

— Truth_Hurts (@Speaks_truths) August 8, 2017

I campaigned &voted for PMB in 3 pres elections. His health has made him unable to deliver the change we sought thru him. HE SHOULD RESIGN.

— ogbuanna (@OgbuAnna) August 8, 2017

I voted for PMB in 2015 &til now I stil love him. But honestly, I think the president should resign and face his health. Health is wealth

— Martins Billion MBA ?✈️ (@Martins_Foundat) August 8, 2017

Thanks for loving him.
More thanks for your call for him to resign.

I don't love him but will start once he resigns.#ResumeOrResign

— Comrade Ugo (@UgoBenitez) August 8, 2017

LMAOOOO.

 

2. Wale Gates

Auntie Lauretta is not laughing at what Deji and the boys are doing. She actually believes it is disrespectful for anyone to probe into matters of a private citizen. Twitter is understandably upset.

Reactions:

Define Private

Buhari is a private citizen, living in a presidential mansion, flying in a presidential jet, enjoying presidential perks.

— Mike Asukwo (@Asukwoeb) August 8, 2017

Madam Lauretta take your sub https://t.co/urSpyWZA3l

— ijeoma Ezeasor (@EzeasorIje) August 8, 2017

Let’s play a game

Aso Rock calling

I think I'll go to Abuja House on Saturday…..at least if they don't want to produce the President, they might serve me nkwobi & suya….

— Gege (@nigeriasbest) August 8, 2017

I hear the Presidential Chef does some delicious dishes. Won't mind lunch there…..

— Gege (@nigeriasbest) August 8, 2017

Take your L, Auntie Onochie

If u examine D brains of 70% of Buharists & Buharideens; u will notice that on the left side nothing right & on the right side nothing left. https://t.co/ngvVWTj7CW

— Adetutu Balogun (@Tutsy22) August 8, 2017

Those who would have asked for the head of GEJ are openly saying Buhari can be away for as long as he wants. Such disgraceful attitude.

— Dr. Dipo Awojide (@OgbeniDipo) August 8, 2017

Sigh.

 

4. Onye Nkuzi

Nigeria these days is one long endless sigh. Onye Nkuzi’s contemplations are gloomy:

We've had eight military dictators since Independence. If we could produce a Paul Kagame or a Jerry Rawlings, we would have, long ago.

— Onye Nkuzi (@cchukudebelu) August 8, 2017

Reactions:

What about Ironsi, that would have been our JK Rawlings

— Ufuoma Idebe (@UfuomaIdebe) August 8, 2017

No. He didn't have the balls to execute the officers that should have been executed for carrying out the first coup.

— Vito (@elbanks) August 8, 2017

jury still out on Kagame

— john blaze (@groovehousejack) August 8, 2017

They say that Murtala Mohammed would have been the one

— Malachy Odo II (@MalachyOdo1) August 8, 2017

Debatable.

 

5. Elnathan John

What isn’t debatable is the state these children have been left in for so long. Who did this to us, Nigerians? Who stole our milk of human kindness.

https://twitter.com/elnathan_john/status/894843976162967553

Reactions:

This is beyond heartbreaking. Everywhere, evidence that we have failed as human beings and as a community, society and country.

— Kadaria Ahmed (@KadariaAhmed) August 8, 2017

The things that make me saddest for Nigeria are things like this. It's not what our leaders do to us, it's what we do to each other. https://t.co/urp56uukwj

— Yung S'Challa (@saratu) August 8, 2017

Bad govt, police/military brutality/ NAF bombing & the list goes on. Sometimes you need to destroy a building with faulty foundation to

— #EndSarNow! Human. (@DoDeRightThing) August 8, 2017

Start all over. Constitution amendments will not cure Nigeria ( Nigeria is suffering from a terminal illness, assisted death is the answer)

— #EndSarNow! Human. (@DoDeRightThing) August 8, 2017

It's time for the media / journalist to look into these atrocities and bring to public notice. Speak up journalists, speak up!

— Victor Onyeaba (@COnyeaba) August 8, 2017

And so we have.

6. Trump

Another person speaking up about injustice to his person is the President of the United States, Donald Trump.

After 200 days, rarely has any Administration achieved what we have achieved..not even close! Don't believe the Fake News Suppression Polls!

— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) August 8, 2017

7. Dr Joe Abah

Our favourite civil servant, who keeps his word and doesn’t trade in fake news, won a bet that this reform will actually be possible. Isn’t that wonderful?

Remember when we announced on 26 December, 2017 that @bpsr_ng would improve passports & licence processes this year? pic.twitter.com/7V8iiz4zLn

— Dr. Joe Abah (@DrJoeAbah) August 8, 2017

The school's account is under TSA. If I pay there, I'm just donating to FG (God forbid). We had to use personal acct. so this is a test

— tyro (@DoubleEph) August 8, 2017

Reactions:

God bless him.He's a man of honor.Good job Sire

— raji matthew (@disloman) August 8, 2017

Nice! No more touts at the federal secretariat in PH; No more stories of no booklets; no more stories of system down; no more "extra" fees! https://t.co/AqdAXpVZOi

— Darego (@dMaclayton2) August 8, 2017

Whoop! Whoop!

8. Victor Asemota

This one is for the techies. It’s not a whoop; it’s more of a meh (no offence). Before you go disrupting things with new products, you might want to read this.

An airtime dealer told me in Lagos that tech people have far easier jobs. They have to hustle to sell the products and we make them obsolete

— Victor Asemota (@asemota) August 8, 2017

I still wonder why they haven't pivoted. They should've moved on to being Mobile money agents or something

— Hafiz Ibrahim (@fizo07) August 8, 2017

You can't pivot to what is not making you money. Airtime still provides better margins and incentives.

— Victor Asemota (@asemota) August 8, 2017

Yea, physical airtime as a business is going. Tech disruption. A very big concern cos it will create a big job loss. Imagine the value chain

— DigitalOrbits (@PrimeOrbits) August 8, 2017

Imagine.