To say every crime is triggered or provoked is to blame victims of murder, robbery, fraud, rape, and all other crimes. Where is the sense in that?
I promised not to get emotional about this but the truth is, it is hard not to get emotional when talking about rape. I have had a close shave with rape, and sometimes I imagine the effect it would have had on my life if I had not escaped it. So, yes I will be emotional about the nauseating piece written by Kenechi Uzochukwu on YNaija, (No, I won’t put a link to a sickening piece like that) that claims men must rape something.
[READ: “Kenechi Uzochukwu: Men can do nothing against rape (Y! Superblogger)“]
Kenechi Uzochukwu made some deadly assumptions about men and rape; these assumptions are the brick stones that built the rape culture. And just when we think we are beginning to draw some attention to rape in Nigeria, he has reminded us of the misconceptions, ignorance and utter nonsensicality we are up against.
Here are some of the statements he made and my responses to them;
It would be far easier to stage a campaign to encourage decent dressing in women than to expect men to exercise self control.
For decades the society has given so much attention to the ‘how not to be a victim’ message to women. Has it reduced rape? No. Why? Because for as long as rapists walk away free and the victims get blamed, the crime will continue to be on a rise. It doesn’t matter what women do or don’t do, a rapist will always find a way to get his next victim if he is sure he will get away with it. The campaign against rape is not so much about preaching self-control to rapists like Kenechi assumes, it is also a campaign to have them severely punished for their crimes and taken off the streets!
Every provocation must be assuaged.
He assumes that men have no self control, and that they must have sex or rape something every time they see a woman’s body. There are so many tempting things we see every day like money displayed on bank counters or someone’s brand new car, is it then okay to go and steal them because we have been tempted? No, every provocation must not be assuaged.
Men do not know and will never know what it really means to be raped.
Men get raped too and not every man thinks that being raped either by another man or a woman is a pleasurable experience like the article suggests. Also, there are many men out there who fight against rape every day and they don’t have to experience it to do so.
Men must rape something. If not a woman or child, they will rape themselves.
This is one of the most meaningless things I have ever read about rape. No, men must not rape something, and there are millions of men who have never and will never rape something. The desire to have sex is not the same as the desire to rape something.
Rape is provoked. All crimes are triggered or provoked.
To say every crime is triggered or provoked is to blame victims of murder, robbery, fraud, rape, and all other crimes. Where is the sense in that? What will Kenechi say about rape in parts of the country where women cover themselves from head to toe? What will he say about the rape of children and old people? No, they are not casualties or collateral damages like he tried to explain, they are victims like every other rape victim is.
Rape is a crime but Mr Kenechi Uzochukwu just told rapists that it is in their DNA and there is nothing they can do about it.
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Shola Okubote is the Editor of Femme Lounge and tweets as @femmelounge
Op-ed pieces and contributions are the opinions of the writers only and do not represent the opinions of Y!/YNaija.
@Okiri @Don didn’t you check the time this and other rejoinders were published? long before his apologies!
Well, since the disturbing article has been taken down, I suggest this retort be taken down too, and everyone leave the man to his runaway opinion. Let’s not all of start losing needed sleep over a one man’s uncensored utterances. I like my peace on mind.
Thanks Okiri. We writers at times just feel like writing when there is nothing again to write about. The controversial opinion has been pulled down; author apologised. What else do we want? There are some other new areas to touch if we must write. Can we just stop these rantings and look else where?
So much foolishness. So much stupidity.
And to think that he even assumes that when boy/ man is gang-rapped by females, he would very much gladly walk down that same path for a repeat,just goes without doubt to show how perverted this arrggggh! it's a lot of effort having to refrain from calling you names! You NEED help, and solitary confinement!
Mr. Kenechukwu must have raped someone before and he is just trying to justify his actions. Very disappointing one from a writer I know..
I find it hard to believe that a man will write such rubbish. I know they can think it or say it to their friends cos some of them are that shallow,but for a human being to put a name to this article then im worried.
This dude must have rapped before. I remember having a conversation with one mistake of a man, was telling him about a woman that was rapped, after all the awwws he said "but that rape go sweet oooo" There and then, i cut off all contacts.
Men need JESUS
Nice follow-up, Shola! You made his errors quite clear.