Kay Aishida: Stemming the Yuletide (Y! Superblogger)

There’s another new breed of irritating extortionists we have out there now. These group are the youth carnival organizers.

It’s December again peeps and I’d like to wish you all a Happy New Month!

Let’s face it, 2012 has been a year of radical reforms in the area of transportation and if you’re a Lagosian you’ll have to agree with me.

This is not the easiest of times to be a vehicle owner in Lagos State. We’ve got so much Traffic Laws in the state that even lawyers are banging their heads together trying to keep up. One can’t help but feel some measure of sympathy for the Nigerian Constitution which didn’t get nearly as much coverage and content.

As a motorist, you will have to keep an eye out for traffic officials or you might end up spending your Christmas budget on hellish fines.

First of all, you will have to keep an eye out for the police. They’re everyone’s worst nightmare but one we have to live with. They have families so if they sniff any offence on you, you’re going to have to contribute at least one chicken into his family’s pot for Christmas. Then you also have the FRSC, VIO and LASTMA officials to contend with and these guys are MEAN!

When you run foul of these ones, they make even the police look like welfare officers. You’ll spend the Yuletide in debt I can assure you. I strongly advice you adhere to all traffic laws. If you can’t keep up, park up. It’s not by force.

Now if you’re a public transport operator, added to all these, you have uniformed street urchins that call themselves NURTW officials. Trust me, they’re a migraine to everyone. They’ll also seek to drain you. They are trouble we can do without. My apologies to the gentlemen amongst them but there’s a better chance of humans finally exploring the Sun than you finding a gentleman amongst those Union officials.

There’s another new breed of irritating extortionists we have out there now. These group are the Youth Carnival organizers.

Now, I don’t know what obtains in other states but in Lagos and almost on every street, we have these Carnivals that hold at the end of every year. Now, to state that there is relatively total disregard for law and order in this country will be overstating the obvious but the manner these rolling lemons go about it is very annoying.

Let’s get something straight here, I’m not against youths coming together to have a carnival though I see these events more as a nuisance because of the disturbances and chaos that usually accompany it no thanks to the free flow of alcohol and weed. It also wouldn’t have been a problem if these organizers had saved up all through the year or sourced honourably for funds for their carnivals.

But what I do have a problem with is these youths harassing every motorist as the vehicles drive past their streets.

Armed with a sound system, car tires, a carton for collecting the cash, these rascals cause traffic and threaten you if you don’t handover the mandatory amount required of each motorist. They’ll bang on your car and all manner of annoying stuff.

This ridiculous tide should have been stemmed a few years ago when they started simply by pleading and running after every car begging for money but we just smiled and shook our heads.

Now unchecked, it’s slowly but surely turning into a menace.

These motorists don’t live on your street and they’re not getting invites to the carnival so why compel them to part with money? There are some areas you’ll pass that you’ll encounter at least 5 ‘road blocks’. This nonsense ought to be checked and the keyword is ‘NOW’ because it’s not funny at all. The baby is growing into a monster and it’s development is rapid and why the LCDAs (Local Council Development Area) have not nipped this trend in the bud is beyond me.

Commercial bus drivers now have another valid excuse to increase fares. I like parties and carnivals but this is arrant nonsense. I repeat: ‘These guys should find more constructive ways to fund their perfect-excuse-to-get-high carnivals and stop harassing us!’ So I strongly recommend that the relevant authorities take note. I don’t know what the fun-fare is all about sef!

Have a blessed and harassment-free December.


Kay Aishida is simply known to his readers as BlogAces. Predictably, his posts are called BlogAce’s Posts and he tweets @blog_aces. He writes about life generally and tries to lace it with humour. Enjoy it!


Op-ed pieces and contributions are the opinions of the writers only and do not represent the opinions of Y!/YNaija.

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