Every day on the Nigerian internet, there are people who keep our eyes glued to our phone screens as we read their rants, opinions, perspectives on political and social matters, etc. Sometimes, they are just downright ridiculous. We make it our job to take down the names of these noisemakers.

Here’s our list from today:

1. Kelechi Okoro

Someone called me "Dr Mrs" today. i told him it is either he calls me "Dr" or "Mrs"

He said "Ok. Good Morning Mrs"

I said i ll rather be called "Dr" To me, Dr is more prestigious

Uncle is looking at me like "this one is kuku a waste of bride price" pic.twitter.com/sHxhzt3PpH

— Dr.Kelechi Okoro (@Healthertainer) April 9, 2018

Hope you asked if it is his bride price?

2. Chude Jideonwo

It is because we judge people too harshly that we are unable to forgive ourselves when we fall.

— Chude Jideonwo (@Chude) April 9, 2018

Biko nu, tell them. Tell them oo.

If you judge people based on their actions rather than words – that is acceptable. If somebody lies to you or cheats you, you have the right to call them a liar/cheat. That is judging someone, but it is a fair judgment.

However, judgments based on appearance is not a good thing. Since we often judge others with insufficient knowledge, it can be insensitive and ‘harsh’ just as Chude has highlighted. Judgements should be used for good but can often create hatred and animosity.

3. Nasir El-Rufai

BREAKING NEWS: PMB has just announced to APC NEC his intention to run for a second term of office. Alhamdulillah. – Nasir El-Rufai

— Nasir Ahmad El-Rufai (@elrufai) April 9, 2018

E pele oo, newsman. Like we didn’t know.

We already knew he will carry a ‘new’ broom and say: ‘let us consolidate on the change we have started‘.

Yimu!

Someone has something to say to President Buhari as he ‘declares’ to run again.

https://twitter.com/iamcompereariyo/status/983307337539706882

This one is angry oo. Speaking English upandan.

Just go and vote next year.

4. Mista Biyi

I mean if you want to have abortion, have it, someone will still marry you but it won’t be me.

— ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ- Mufu (@Mistabiyi) April 9, 2018

Hopefully you will marry a virgin from heaven.

5. ClintonViceB

This chick in my mention has been insulting me all morning because I was wondering how any sane Human supports a vile and toxic person like Cee C. I didn't even reply.

Then I viewed her avi and she has small boob????

Now I understand why she's angry ?????

— DaT AkWa IbOm Gee??? (@ClintonViceB) April 9, 2018

I thought they said we should love each other ‘unconditionally’?

Some people are just wicked shaa.

6. Lauretta Onochie

What is wrong with this one?

CONGRATULATIONS NIGERIANS
CONGRATULATIONS AFRICANS
President Buhari has heeded your call. He's standing for 2019
Ma Su Gudu SuGudu

— Lauretta Onochie (@Laurestar) April 9, 2018

IT'S OFFICIAL. PRESIDENT BUHARI IS STANDING FOR THE 2019 PRESIDENTIAL ELECTION.
CONGRATULATIONS NIGERIANS
CONGRATULATIONS AFRICANS
WE SAY RUN!
THEY SAY, DON'T RUN
President Buhari has heeded OUR call. He's standing for 2019
THEY FAILED. WE WON.
GOD BLESS NIGERIA. pic.twitter.com/wEYYtKViNr

— Lauretta Onochie (@Laurestar) April 9, 2018

Who and who asked Buhari to re-contest?

Maybe Africans oo, but Nigerians?

Some replies:

Heeded to which call ?to back to Daura ,it is good bcos it will be an easy ride for the opposition

— Festus Ehimare (@Festyehis) April 9, 2018

It is well. Bubu is a good man. He must ensure a total cabinet shake up b4 he can earn my vote. So many bad eggs frustrating the good effort of baba

— Sam Adédìran Àlàdé (@adediran_alade) April 9, 2018

Sam Alade got a point though.

Breaking news, Nigerians have just announced their intentions to send Buhari back to Daura come 2019 for displaying incompetence since 2015

— Nduji Chukwudi (@iam_mandc) April 9, 2018

7. Pius Adesanmi

That is the problem with soot. It is no respecter of status. When it clogs your critical faculty, you start to hallucinate that the Federal govt is after you. My brother, listen to d people and take the soot problem in Port Harcourt extremely seriously. https://t.co/5lZ0gmDKyn

— Pius Adesanmi (@pius_adesanmi) April 9, 2018

It is just shameful that a governor will leave important issues and be playing politics while the soot in his state remains.

Just look at what Nyesom Wike says: “My investigation reveals that the Federal Government, using her security agencies, is planning to set me up anytime I am travelling outside the country. They plan to organise security to storm the hotel I am staying and say they found xyz cash in my possession, after which they would say I was arrested for currency trafficking or whatever offences outside the country.

“They will then precipitate crisis in my state and other parts of Nigeria…”

Dear Wike, we are NO LONGER dummies in Nigeria. Those underlined words do not even make sense to you.

Face the problems in your state and stop the unfounded accusations – like Melaye like Wike.

Sigh!