Don’t do it: 7 deadly sins of dating

by Margeaux Baulch Klein

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People do not change very much as they get older, especially men. So if there are numerous things about him that you can’t stand, then it might be wiser to just change to a different man.

1. RUSHING INTO SEX

There isn’t a universal right time to become intimate with a new partner, however, if you have sex before a man has had a chance to get to know you, then you risk him placing you in the “fling” category and losing interest. A man has to invest and appreciate your other qualities beyond the physical for him to want to make you his girlfriend. So don’t be afraid to take your time and make him wait until it feels right for you; the “three date rule” is a myth!

2. OPENING UP TOO FAST

Likewise, it isn’t smart to rush in and tell him all of your sad childhood stories. Although it’s natural to want to speed up the bonding process, you have to pace the amount of information you share. You don’t want to scare him offwith TMI or convince him that you’re a high-drama mamma.

3. CALLING/TEXTING/EMAILING TOO MUCH

While it’s true that we live in an age of over-sharing, you’ll just have to trust us on this one and play it cool. Men typically enjoy playing the role of the chaser, not the chasee, so constantly calling them can have the reverse effect of making them less interested, not more. So put down that phone, slowly back away from the computer, and let him sweat it out for a change.

4. SPYING ON HIM

It may be tempting to take a quick peak at his Blackberry, but there’s no faster way to inflame trust issues than to snoop.

5. FAKING ORGASMS

Faking is a like a harmless, little white lie, right? No! In the long run, you are actually doing both of yourselves a huge disservice by allowing him to think that his moves are pleasing you when they really aren’t. Besides, what if you marry him? Are you really going to keep up the Meg Ryan act into your old age?

6. EXPECTING HIM TO CHANGE

People do not change very much as they get older, especially men. So if there are numerous things about him that you can’t stand, then it might be wiser to just change to a different man.

7. NEGLECTING YOURSELF

While it’s important to nurture a budding relationship, sacrificing all of your energy and time to it and ignoring your own needs is a huge mistake. Whether you’re in a relationship or not, you should always love and take care of yourself first.

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Op-ed pieces and contributions are the opinions of the writers only and do not represent the opinions of Y!/YNaija.

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