Finding the woman who is always available

by Sarah Anand Anma

african-american-woman-dating

If a man does whatever he can to make a woman happy and she is closed down in a protective mode, it erodes his confidence and challenges his masculinity.

We have an epidemic of women who don’t know how to be happy. It is a direct result of being fed this bill of goods that if we DO it all, we can have it all.
We run ourselves into the ground in pursuit of the “ideal woman” status.

There is no way to have it all and be it all because as soon as one acquires “it,” another allusive “it” comes into play.

Today’s woman is taught in order to have security and protection, she needs to be hyper independent and in control, which are two ways to squeeze out happiness.

Furthermore, this phony protective measure, is really tough on men who, in general, are wired to contribute to women’s happiness.

Men get vitality from happy women, and the effect is greatly compounded when they provide an opportunity for more happiness.

Unhappy women deplete men. If a man does whatever he can to make a woman happy and she is closed down in a protective mode, it erodes his confidence and challenges his masculinity.

Many men come to me who have been worn out.

One client spoke of how he desperately tried to fix his girlfriend or make her happy. Neither of them realized she was unable to make herself happy.

Therefore, no attempt he made could have the desired effect.

When a woman cannot source happiness within, there is no way for her to allow others to contribute to her happiness. It is a lose/lose situation.

We have all been in a restaurant at the table next to a woman who is down and depressed or complaining. It’s as if she’s drawing the life force out of every being within earshot.

We also know the benefit of receiving a genuine warm smile from a woman as she walks down the street. The ripple effect is huge.

When a woman receives love and happiness, all around her are warmly affected. When she is closed down to receiving, she is like a Death Eater from “Harry Potter” and makes things bleak.

Watch for women who are able to be happy as they are.

These are the ones who can access joy within and look for opportunities to grow their happiness in every corner.

You can spot them smiling as they walk down the street, allowing others to open doors for them (women can also open doors for other women) and receiving any attempt made to contribute to their happiness with gratitude.

Guys, what signs tell you a woman is unavailable? How do you plan on finding a woman who is happy with who she is?

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Read this article in Dating Advice

 

 

Op-ed pieces and contributions are the opinions of the writers only and do not represent the opinions of Y!/YNaija.

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