by Erica Renee

…before a certain age you get a pass for blowing up your boyfriend’s phone when he doesnt’ answer or calling an ex to pour out your feelings….but once you consider yourself a grown-up, it’s completely unacceptable.

Recently I had a ‘girl you know you’re too old for that’ moment. As I hung up the phone from a heated argument with a ‘friend’, I decided I wasn’t done talking (despite the fact that I was the one who ended the conversation and hung up the phone).

I called him back to finish off my thoughts. ‘Ooh this is good’, I thought as I recited in my head the cutting words I would say once he picked up the phone. As the phone rang a couple of times, it was clear that he wasn’t trying to answer my calls; and he didn’t. So I called back again only to receive his voicemail. As I started to call back  for the third time, I stopped myself and hung up the phone. I really didn’t even want to talk that bad. However, my anger increased when he refused to answer my calls. In the past, I would call back until I got tired (pathetic I know. I just hate to be ignored). I laughed at my sudden, silly, girlish behavior. I knew I was too old to act this way; but even us grown girls have our moments right? This behavior, among other things, needs the ‘girl you’re too old for that’ stamp, to remind us to leave the girly, childish behavior to the girls.

1. Displaying Bug-A-Boo Tendencies

Not that anyone should ever be a bug-a-boo, but before a certain age you get a pass for blowing up your boyfriend’s phone when he doesnt’ answer or calling an ex to pour out your feelings. Again, this behavior isn’t especially healthy at any age; but once you consider yourself a grown-up, it’s completely unacceptable. By now you should have gotten the memo that if he doesn’t pick up, he doesn’t want to talk, or that there is a time, place, and person to pour out your feelings. Choose that time, place, and person responsibly.

2. I Want a Thug Mentality

If your last few dates have only consisted of the neighborhood drug dealers or schemers, it may be time to re-evaluate yourself. Of course, most women have gone through the ‘I want a thug’ phase, but after growing up and seeing where this thug life leads, most women begin to wise up. If you’re still stuck in that phase, you know you’re too old for that. There is a big difference in wanting a man who isn’t afraid to protect you if necessary than having someone shoot up the neighborhood in your defense. If the latter is still appealing to you, girl..grow up!

3. Choosing a Shopping Spree Over Rent

Those shoes are calling your name; but so is your rent. It’s the first of the month and rents due; but those shoes you’ve been wanting for so long are finally on sale. Still, you’re on a budget and buying those special shoes will set you back and possibly cause you to be short on rent. Which do you choose?

While this may seem like a rather dumb issue to some, to others it may be a serious, thought-provoking question. The truth is, most of us have all made poor financial decisions; but after a certain age important bills should not be neglected to support your love for fashion.

4. Partying Comes Before Business

If your happy hours lead to the nightclub and result in you calling out of work often, this behavior is unacceptable. Partying so hard that you aren’t taking care of your business is reserved for the young girls. As an adult, partying has to take the backseat to taking care of your business.

If you’re still marking your calendars to ensure that you attend every festival, celebrity birthday bash, and all-star weekends, you may need to re-evaluate your priorities.

5. Having Important Conversations in 160 Words Or Less

Call me old-fashioned, but I still love having a good ‘ole conversation, preferably face-to-face, but at least via phone. As a busy person, I utilize text messages and emails quite often; but I try to limit them to business and quick dialogue, not serious conversations with friends, family, or loved ones. If you are pouring your heart out to your man via text, arguing with a friend about a serious incident, or anything else that should require a real conversation, you know you’re too old for that.

Admittedly, I am somewhat guilty of this behavior; but we can’t let technology replace genuine, real conversation. There are certain emotions that cannot be displayed in 160 characters or less or properly conveyed through text or email.

6. Using Social Networking As Your Public Diary

While somewhat entertaining to see people ‘act a fool’ via social networking, it also creates a ‘girl you’re too old for that’ response. No one needs a play by play account of your day, find out about childhood secrets, or who you don’t like at the moment.

Social networking has not only become a place to network but also a platform to be entertained. Still, remember that once you put it out there for the social world to see, you can’t take it back. Save your rants and raves for your close circle of friends and family.

7. Making Decisions Because You ‘Feel’ Like It

Girls are quick to speak and make impulsive decicions, as women we have to understand that the decision making process doesn’t just involve emotions. After a certain age, you shouldn’t do things just because you ‘feel’ like it. That feeling can cause some long term repercussions that even big girls don’t want to handle. You’re too old to not think before you speak or act.

8. ‘Doing It Because Your Friends Do It’

At what age do people stop giving in to peer pressure? While I’m not for certain, I do know that as an adult it’s unacceptable to admit that you did something based off of peer pressure or because all of your girls were doing it. If you’re still going against what you know is right or even want to do simply because ‘everyone else’ is doing it, you know you’re too old for that.

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Read this article in Madame Noire

 

Op-ed pieces and contributions are the opinions of the writers only and do not represent the opinions of Y!/YNaija.