Ayomikun Samuel: Love and the many shades of Valentine’s Day

Aljazeera was the first media I ever heard the names, Sharon Johnson (SJ) and Sandra Kaye Johnson (SKJ) on one particular afternoon. No thanks to some of our Nigerian TV stations who just occupy a frequency slot of our limited frequency spectrum yet give out junks and disseminate insensitive information.

I had watched Aljazeera with an undivided attention that afternoon. In good conscience, it was a very sensitive documentary. There was actually a nasty spell in Canada’s living history and no nation of the world is insulated from this obnoxious reality. The biopic told of aboriginal victims who went to a place of no return. It was as pathetic as the documentary I watched on the National Television Authority, NTA about slave trade in Badagry some weeks ago. At the time, social injustice was a colophon in Canada. An unsolved murder case is one of such evil. SKJ was one of such hapless individual cum several others.

SKJ was in her teenage years before she died and she was SJ’s youngest sister. True, No sane person cares whether the whites were unjust or not, only cared about distributive justice. That’s all. On February 13, 1992, a day before Valentine’s Day, Sharon lost her treasured sister, SKJ to the cold hands of death.

Ditto the others, the circumstances sorrounding Sandra’s death is a very shaky one. Win-or-lose, Sharon gave birth to an idea called Annual Valentine’s Day memorial walk. The noble idea was to honour victims of social injustice, violence and gruesome murder. Most of whose families are still in perpetual grief. Sharon’s intentions are clear. Helping families that had lost relations gain some inner strength, providing glimpse of hope in the ugly face of hopelessness, keeping memories of loved ones alive and providing succour to affected people in the midst of pain and despair.

This annual memorial walk is a solemn walk which is to remember loved relations, give families of victims a rare voice and to raise awareness of the many cases of unsolved murders and missing women in Canada. No weather condition deters Canadians from showing their unflinching support for this noble course.

At some occasion when it did rain cats and dogs, people still dared a torrent-like rain by doing the walk with their Umbrellas, mackintosh or gabardine. No media coverage of the walk. It is a sacred walk in honour of murdered and missing indigenous women in Canada. As part of the fervent walk, people walk the walk by carrying photographs and showing signs in memory of loved ones, banners are printed to show discontent against common injustice, violence and unsolved murder.

Some Canadians also show unconditional love to this missing and murdered women and children over the social media. On twitter for example, hashtags like #NeverForgotten, #Walk4Justice, #StopTheViolence received wide coverage yearly and it is quite trendy. Even hashtags like #WalkTheWalk, #TalkTheTalk also found its own place in the social cyber space. More thanks, Walk4Justice (W4J) is an institution formed with total reliance on donations and contributions from volunteers. This institution was institutionalized to complement Sharon’s intention of reducing violence and increasing the safety of aboriginal women in Canada.

All of a sudden, something dropped into my subconscious. If SKJ and other victims were Nigerians, memories of them would have vanquished into the air ever since 1994 and afterwards. That is Nigerians for you. Alive or dead, Nigerians don’t cherish their own.

If nothing at all, Sharon has taught the rest of the world how best to celebrate the Valentine’s Day. It is not solely in marking the day’s register at local restaurants, bar and clubs. It does not typify wearing the combo of white-red coloured clothes. Don’t get me wrong, there is nothing bad in enjoying oneself on the day either by hook or crook but my emphasis is that, February 14th should be celebrated in a more holistic way rather than mere messing around and walking helter-skelter the whole town and street.

In a matter of days from now, the whole cosmos would be thrown into another moment of euphoria impregnated with love, emotion and romance. However, countries have varying ways of celebrating Valentine’s Day. For instance, in Slovenia by tradition, February 14th is set aside for birds. In Finland, Estonia and even Canada, February 14th is less of romance and more of friendship. In wales, February 14th is a time when men give women a ‘love spoon’ as a token of their affection. More importantly, it is part of the needful to know, what does February 14th mean to Nigeria as a country?

In the annals of our recent history, Nigeria as a nation-state has been plagued with spate of insecurity by Boko-Haram and several other ethnic militias. In a bid to stop the nefarious and deadly activities perpetuated by these countless monsters on mother land. Some Nigerians have diurnally and nocturnally defended the territorial integrity and national sovereignty of this nation at the very detriment of their personal lives, in the gloomy face of inadequate arsenals, and gross corruption amongst the military hierarchy.

According to an Aljazeera report recently, it was noted that the war between Boko Haram and the Nigerian government had killed 20,000 people in six years [EPA] and driven 2.3 million people from their homes.

From the foregoing, it is crystal that Boko Haram has maimed, displaced, killed many Nigerians, destroyed farmlands, obliterated ancestral homes, villages and equally abducted our children, sisters, brothers, mothers, fathers, grandmothers, grandfathers and even communities. Our departed gallant soldiers all inclusive.

Days ago, Aljazeera also reported that at least 86 people, including children were killed in a series of attacks on a village in Northern Nigeria. It was equally reported that the whole village of Dalori was razed down and children were burnt alive. This is cruel genocide against humanity.

Some other beloved of ours are still declared missing. Worse, our sisters from Chibok town of Borno state, the ones we called Chibok girls are still missing. Perchance, they are missing or have been murdered. We lack the will to discern their present state or even fate. The present situation in Nigeria is not as worse as was in Canada when Sharon took the bold initiative and several Canadians subscribed by supporting her.

I put forward that February 14th 2016, which coincidentally falls on a Sunday, be used to remember our missing and murdered sisters, children, brothers, fathers, grandfathers, grandmothers and even the child in the womb that was killed by the Boko Haram and several other Nigerians that are now dead as a result of sectarian crises and intermittent rouse of ethnic militias. The reason is coherent enough.

Valentine’s Day is about showing love to people of immediate or distant background. In so doing, we need to show the families of Boko-Haram victims some love. We need to let them know that we share in their pain, comfort the wives of our fallen soldiers, speak to the enemies at their gate with our show of compassion, give them the inner strength needed to cope with the loss of their breadwinner. That is what I expect from Nigeria and Nigerians as valentine gifts. Not Greek gifts.

In the dictum of Evelyn Waugh, a British novelist, the author of the famous published novel, Vile Bodies, “when the war broke out, she took down the signed photograph of the Kaiser and, with some solemnity, hung it in the menservants’ lavatory; it was her one combative action.” Things that heal wounds, fix broken hearts, resuscitate hopelessness are with us. We don’t need to go to the market place to buy them. Of course, these things are priceless whereas things in the market come with price-tags.

I don’t know the plans of civil society groups, non-governmental organisations, the Nigerian government, well-meaning Nigerians like Dr Joe Odumakin, Dr Oby Ezekwesili, co-convener of the Bring Back Our Girls (BBOG) advocacy group, Pastor Funke Felix Adejumo et al towards 14 February 2016. Whatever may be the plans, let us all remember to share our moments with the bereaved, homeless, hapless that has lost their perfect moment because of the Nigerian phenomenon. Food will finish, money will finish but one thing will not finish- Human beings.

Many years ago, the father of the present president of the United States of America, Barack Hussein Obama couldn’t afford his son a local restaurant but today, the rest is history.
Happy Valentine’s Day.

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