Every day on the Nigerian internet, there are people who keep our eyes glued to our phone screens as we read their rants, opinions, perspectives on political and social matters, etc. Sometimes, they are just downright ridiculous. We make it our job to take down the names of these noisemakers.
Here’s our list from today:
1 Jide Ogunsanwo
Twitter is obsessed today with the current occupants of the president’s office- rats, not Buhari, but before we immerse ourselves in the banter, we just had to feature this dude who dared compare Jay Z’s 4:44 with Buhari.
It’s the power of numerology, we guess.
For the second time around, Buhari has chosen to work from home following a trip back to Nigeria. He did that when he first returned from his 50 day spell, and Twitter NG was quite befuddled. This time around, it’s not the president’s ill health keeping him home bound, but rats.
Would you believe it, the Lion King is afraid of rats!
TwitterNG has had a field day with this news.
D E V A S T A T I O N pic.twitter.com/EZ5ZwRz2Uf
— tyro (@DoubleEph) August 22, 2017
The kind only rats can cause.
As if Nigeria didn't have enough problems already – now you have rodents capable of scaring a lion away
— tyro (@DoubleEph) August 22, 2017
Stranger things have happened.
Rats in President's office. I know we don't respect ourselves but let us preserve the prestige of this nation. This is Nigeria.
— Oluseun Onigbinde (@seunonigbinde) August 22, 2017
With a rat infestation problem at the seat of power.
3. Cheta Nwanze
2/ Despite a budget of ₦2,000,000 for fumigation, the only lie Aso Rock could come up with is rats! pic.twitter.com/TXhjPWiloC
— Chxta (@Chxta) August 22, 2017
Welllllll, good quality lies are hard to tell. And we know the media team does not specialise in that brand.
With all the millions spent on Aso Rock, regular pest control is a problem? These are the people handling the whole country? Ha! 🙆🏾♂️ https://t.co/zVSaQbcMIf
— AYO SOGUNRO (@ayosogunro) August 22, 2017
No one said multi tasking was easy.
Aso Rock is not fumigated? Haba! https://t.co/jF36PFAINO
— Dele Momodu Ovation (@DeleMomodu) August 22, 2017
Don’t be angry. The fumigator travelled to London with President, sah.
Maybe Buhari brought the rats back from London as a way to extend his leave 🤔
— T. Rankïn' 🤓 (@AfroVII) August 22, 2017
This is notice that you have crossed a national red line.
You have been served.
Rats invaded PMB's office. Does it mean he was suffering from Lassa Fever?
— Nnayelugo (@Eloka51) August 22, 2017
Chai.There is God oooo!
— Babatope! (@bbtp) August 22, 2017
Is it not shameful to say rodents exist in the presidents office? Whats next, rats ate the Policy papers or cockroaches destroyed the Treaty
— Chip (@emmortalis_) August 22, 2017
You’re in the spirit, brethren.
The rats the ate Buhari's certificate apparently have taken over his office at Asorock…
— afrispheric (@afrispheric) August 22, 2017
I see red lines everywhere.
Buhari, Garba shehu and the newspaper that reported this nonsense, all of them are mad together😒😒😒
— Rilly green (@adebayoadekunzy) August 22, 2017
It takes one to know.
Rats like to be around garbage. Remove two letters from garbage – what do you have?
— Mark Amaza (@amasonic) August 22, 2017
Garba, they are calling you.
Bruh she said when the lion king comes he'll send us out, DOES SHE KNOW WE KNOW HE'S AFRAID OF RATS???? DOES SHE? pic.twitter.com/OrUywRha3a
— B (@bbellgam) August 22, 2017
LMAooooo. How will she know when she’s been banished to ze ozza room?
So upon all the noise about Lions, Jackals and Hyenas, ordinary house rats drove @MBuhari away from his office… It's not easy…
— Mr. Aye Dee (@MrAyeDee) August 22, 2017
…But it is worth it- yes? 3 more months of rest, man
Rats that can pad budget are not "ordinary". Please show respect to our governmental rodents. https://t.co/Tn0qtM5f9U
— orwelliANDYstopia (@andyRoidO) August 22, 2017
I'm done with satire. https://t.co/IcBqE3bWcR
— Elnathan John (@elnathan_john) August 22, 2017
Right behind you.
7. Pius Adesanmi
Like begets like.
8. Moses Ochonu
Take your L in peace.
When you wake up every morning, tell yourself “Odeshi” 5 times, you will survive.
Change ya lens.
History of rats
I will wipe out rats… if elected-Braithwaite
It is a shameless race… Whata rat race stylee-Mandators
— The Great Oracle (@AbdulMahmud01) August 22, 2017
Irresponsible element is your middle name.
10. Demola Olarewaju
They said there was no vacuum in the President's absence but Nigerian rats have proved their mettle yet again with a Tom and Jerry Govt.
— Demola Olarewaju (@DemolaRewaju) August 22, 2017
The story of Nigeria.