Treat her right: 10 important things to know about women

from LoveSystems

Men who are experienced in how to get women know that you can’t make it too easy for her. If she knows that she can have you before she’s done anything to deserve your attention other than being pretty, then she might be flattered, but she won’t be attracted.

How to get women: it’s really the only thought that has crossed the minds of Stifler, the horny teens from Superbad, and virtually the rest of the world’s single, male population. Even the ones that have found success are still wondering how they hooked up and how to duplicate the blueprint of picking up women to make it work over and over.

As a professional with plenty of experience in this realm, we’ve studied the field and come up with a successful blueprint in the Magic Bullets Handbook, which is filled with hundreds of great insights that you can improve to get better with women. The more you follow, the more successful you’ll be – no matter who you are.

While the book is the main entrée, here’s a set of appetizers in the form of the 10 most important things you need to know about how to get women:

1. See girl, move feet


The man usually makes the first move. Even if she’s interested in you, the most she’s likely to do is to stand near you or make eye contact a couple times to encourage you to approach her.

Once you see her, don’t hesitate. 10 minutes from now she might not be there or another guy might have beaten you to the punch. Plus, women can tell when you’re working up the courage to approach. Shyness might be endearing in movies and romance novels, but it doesn’t work in the real world. Approach right away, even if you don’t know what you’re going to say (we’ll cover that later).

2. Attraction before comfort

Men who don’t know how to get women often ask her lots of questions hoping that they’ll stumble on something they have in common.

Sometimes this can work, but usually not. Until she has a reason to care about what you think of her, you’re just another random guy asking her the same questions every other random guy asks her. One thing we teach on Love Systems bootcamps is to tell her (or better, show her) something interesting about yourself first. When she gets curious about you, she will start with the questions.

This is especially important in terms of how to get beautiful women. Hotter women usually get approached more and have less tolerance for the usual “random guy” questions.

3. Statements, not questions

This is connected to the last point. Questions contribute nothing to a conversation and tell her nothing about you. Too many questions makes it feel like a job interview.

Never ask two questions in a row. Statements can often replace questions. Instead of asking where’s she’s from, tell her where you’re from and she may respond in kind. Or guess where she’s from. It doesn’t matter if you are right; either way it’s more interesting than yet another factual question.

4. Playful, not serious


Fun and playful works much better than serious and deep. This is true whether you want a series of one-night stands or whether you’re like a recent client of mine who told me my job for him was to find me a wife.

Even serious women go out because they want to relax and have fun. There’s a time and a place for being serious and deep, but it’s not within 15 minutes of meeting her. Smile, laugh, and don’t take everything too seriously.

5. Be a challenge

Men who are experienced in how to get women know that you can’t make it too easy for her. If she knows that she can have you before she’s done anything to deserve your attention other than being pretty, then she might be flattered, but she won’t be attracted.

Even if you approach her with a compliment, which is something that is often done in day game, let this mean that she has your curiosity, not your undying love. Don’t give her compliments she hasn’t earned.

6. How you dress is your identity

Attractive women get hit on so much that they don’t have time to get to know every single man who wants to talk to her. Within 30-90 seconds, she’s going to decide if you’re a “maybe” or a “no.” A lot of that comes from how you dress.

It’s not just being fashionable. It’s about projecting who you are. Mixed messages are confusing and make women think you’re trying to hide something or be someone you’re not. Lawyers don’t wear ripped jeans. Musicians don’t dress like accountants. Fun, confident men don’t dress to blend in. And so on.

7. Touch early, touch often

You can’t talk a woman into bed or into a relationship. So if you’re wondering how do you get a girl interested in you when nothing you say seems to be working, the problem might be with your hands more than your words.

Touch her (appropriately – hands, shoulders, etc.) as soon as you meet her and slowly escalate the duration and intensity of each touch. Give her time to get comfortable with your touch – if she’s not comfortable holding your hand, she’s definitely not going to be comfortable being sexual with you.

Managing the “physical conversation” is one of the most important things you can do in terms of how to get girls.

8. Use your balls

Playing it safe will never get you the girl. Women appreciate confidence, boldness, and persistence. Make the first move. Some women may like you but still want you to work for it. And don’t whine you’re going home alone if you never tried to get her to come home with you. Like hockey superstar Wayne Gretzky said, you miss 100% of the shots you don’t take.

If you’re shy, visualization is a great inner game technique.

9. The first thing you say doesn’t matter


There is no such thing as a pickup line that will help you learn how to get women. The only purpose of your ‘opening line’ is to start a conversation.

If this doesn’t come easily to you, take some classic Love Systems dating advice and use a neutral opinion opener. Ask her and her friends to settle an argument between you and your friends, like “Is it OK to break up with someone by text message?” or “Do Drunk ‘I Love You’s’ Count?” Run with it for 30-60 seconds, then change the subject to something else. Congratulations – you’re in the door!

10. Be man enough to get help

Men aren’t “supposed” to seek out advice on how to get women or ask their friends how do I get a girl. We don’t sit around analyzing each other’s relationships.

Still, picking up beautiful women is a skill that anyone can learn with enough time, practice, and access to the right resources. There is a ton of free stuff (including a great newsletter) at Love Systems to help you get started. Sometimes the techniques go against “conventional wisdom” or what seems to work in movies and romance novels. Push yourself out of your comfort zone and try them – they DO work and they are a huge advantage over the competition.



Op-ed pieces and contributions are the opinions of the writers only and do not represent the opinions of Y!/YNaija.

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