by Nimi Princewill
Wife hunting has interestingly been modified from a mere romantic craving into a more complex form of informal recruitment.
Candidates who scale through the first series of selection (from episodes of friendship, casual dating and even hookups) are ushered into the next round, with the accompanying tag name- “Wife Material.” This is often the most crucial stage, as these ‘Wife Materials’ are thoroughly expected to come correct on their best behaviour!
At this decision stage, a lady (the wife material) is bound to undergo a secret vetting process from her suitor’s family, close friends and sometimes, nosy neighbours and colleagues, to ascertain how befitting she is of the title, ‘wife’ .
Not also forgetting the likelihood of an unpredictable prophecy that could swing either ways, from a clergyman whose ‘divine opinion’ may possibly be consulted (if they are on the Christian side), to seek “God’s permission” on whether to carry on with the affair or stall proceedings if eventually, God’s mind is presumably read, and the couple “aren’t divinely designed for each other!”
A lot of marriages have been birthed through this thorough recruitment process, yet we can’t seem to catch a break from the never-ending tales of separation/divorce! So, how about we pay little credence to people’s approval of our choices and stick to whom our hearts feel comfortable with?
The true character of an average ‘Wife Material’ could be perceived in so many misjudged ways by her secret observers. Usually:
• Her slight indiscretion in maintaining a solid first impression with her partner’s family/friends
• Her unwavering confidence and outspoken nature (which could be regarded as arrogance and an evident consequence of tacky home training)
• Her less-fanatic interest in religion (which could automatically project her as a foreseeable ‘angel of darkness’ to a clergy)
• Her elegant fashion sense (which exposes her ‘lack of prudence and extreme materialism’)
• Her inability to conceal displeasure over her partner’s disrespectful relative (which proves her ‘future prospects of breaking the family bond, if married into the home’)
• Her disapproval of her partner’s overindulgence with his friends (which ultimately portrays her as being overly possessive!)
Your personal depth of conviction on your ideal choice of partner is all that counts for something! She may treat others ‘bad’ (in their own understanding of her), but if she treats you right, then that’s a good choice for a wife! Her approval rating from your family/friends may be insufficient, but if your heart agrees otherwise, stick with her!
Every woman has got both her attractive and unpleasant side. If people or even a clergy, happens to see just her bad side, it now totally depends on what you see! If what you see in her is pleasant and you’re convinced you can handle the unpleasant half, then you’ve found yourself a great wife!
We aren’t perfect ourselves. The ‘Wife Material’ with a good and bad side, also has a tasking job of accommodating our messy excesses as well. Just follow your heart, your mind and your soul (if they’re any different!)
Op–ed pieces and contributions are the opinions of the writers only and do not represent the opinions of Y!/YNaija
Nimi Princewill is a Nigerian Creative writer / Poet / ‘Social Reformer’. He’s very passionate about the reformation and development of Africa. He’s most notable for his usual controversial opinion on issues that cut across Religion, Sports, Social Lifestyle and Politics.
The author tweets @princewill_nimi