Every day on the Nigerian Internet, there are people who keep our eyes glued to our phone screens as we read their rants, opinions, perspectives on political and social issues, etc. Sometimes, they are just downright ridiculous. We make it our job to take down the names of these noisemakers.
Here are the ones we saw today:
That Divine Oduduru “I worked hard for it” sums up the mindset shift that happens when Nigerians move abroad.
In Nigeria, it’s almost taboo to say you earned success. More acceptable to ascribe to God.
— Editi Effiòng (@EditiEffiong) April 26, 2019
FACTS.
1. Age of consent should be 18 years old.
2. Child marriages and payment of bride prices should be abolished and be punishable by law.
3. FGM should be a crime punishable by law.
4. The anti LGBT rights should be reversed.
5. Minimum wage should be 150k.Good morning.
— Stephanie C Odili (@StephanieOdili) April 26, 2019
But our government is brain-dead.
I ran into His Eminence John Cardinal Onaiyekan this morning. I said “Your Eminence, I will not let you go until you bless me.” He said “God bless you in the name of the Father, the Son and the Holy Ghost.” If you people ask Ezemmuo to bless you, you will be expecting money.??
— Dr. Joe Abah (@DrJoeAbah) April 26, 2019
Zobo.
A man should not ask his wife what she is doing with her salary
— Olumide Iyanda (@olumideiyanda) April 26, 2019
Says the man who asks his wife what she does with her salary.
A Nigerian bank was encouraging aggregators to run their agent platforms on their POS machines. The same bank developed their own clone product on the POS devices to cut out agent aggregators. Now the aggregators have left them and they are losing customers to others.
— Victor Asemota (@asemota) April 26, 2019
When Bernard Dayo isn’t writing about pop culture, he’s watching horror movies and reading comics and trying to pretend his addiction to Netflix isn’t a serious condition.
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