Every day on the Nigerian Internet, there are people who keep our eyes glued to our phone screens as we read their rants, opinions, perspectives on political and social issues, etc. Sometimes, they are just downright ridiculous. We make it our job to take down the names of these noisemakers.
Here are rhe ones we saw today:
“I’m still a member of APC. I’m not a member of PDP, but we have a memorandum of understanding with the PDP to produce Godfearing, good and educated leader.”~ Buba Galadima
Greed is always a fat demon with a small mouth & an unresourceful brain.
— TallJohn? (@JohnFanimokun) July 8, 2019
I “pre-clean” my apartment on the days I know my cleaners are coming over. I essentially do some of their job for them. Because I don’t want to give them the impression I’m a filthy person.
Please how can I uninstall my home training?
— Chloroquine (@nugwatweets) July 8, 2019
So, in other words, you are still filthy person.
I might end up doing a parlor wedding then take my wife for honeymoon in Dubai or Maldives.
Anyone that says my wedding no loud should increase the volume when they get to their house.
— Alex Oluwatobi (@alexlobaloba) July 8, 2019
Just say you are broke bro. No need for this format.
Good morning misogynists and pick mes’
This is a new week, and Feminists are not talking about any girl issue right now. So you can use this week and talk about all the boy issues you want to talk about when we talk about girls.This is your opportunity.
I’m rooting for you?
— tee Nsofor (@tillytate20) July 8, 2019
Criticising Buhari is described as hate for Fulanis by some who see him as their god. But when we were criticising GEJ some of them were happy to hail, RT and didn’t say we hated Niger Deltans. I see this sort of behaviour to be very deceptive, hypocritical and unfair.
— Dr. Dípò Awójídé (@OgbeniDipo) July 8, 2019
I think they should teach the principles of motivational interviewing in medical school, so that most of you will learn the respectful way to encourage behavioral change and stop badgering people in a counterproductive manner. Esp if you are sure you really are trying to help!
— Victor Ugo (@victorr_ugo) July 8, 2019
These are the people you expect to fight for you?
Dear sisters and daughters, the battle has really just begun.
No one will fight our fights for us. Tomorrow this isi aki will become an ‘elder of CAN’ and be part of the team to ‘settle’ RAPE ALLEGATIONS against pastors!! Tsk https://t.co/FfPG6oBmZy
— Juliet ‘Kego | #Poetry4Change (@julietkego) July 8, 2019
When Bernard Dayo isn’t writing about pop culture, he’s watching horror movies and reading comics and trying to pretend his addiction to Netflix isn’t a serious condition.