by Adrianna Velez

 

There’s a rumor out there that most men are reluctant to perform a certain bedroom act on their women. I think you know what I’m talking about.

 

Well, I’m here to tell you it just isn’t true. Not only are there plenty of men willing to give a woman what she most deserves, there are plenty of men who are also quite skilled at it. But what if your guy is reluctant to join the Grown Up Sexual Man Club and give you what you want?

In the short story collection The Women of Brewster Place one savvy woman who wants her conservative husband to pleasure her a certain way came up with an unorthodox idea: She wedged some of his favorite sweet potato pie between her legs. Readers, it worked, and they all lived happily ever after. But you don’t have to go to that extreme. Here’s how to get your man to give you what you want in bed.

1. Tell him you want it.

I mean, maybe you’ve already done this. But just in case you haven’t, this is a friendly reminder that men can’t read your mind. Don’t ask, don’t get. There are fun ways to do this, too. “You know what would be so hot? If you ‘returned the favor!’ I bet you’d be great at that!” Flatter him preemptively.

2. Make yourself fresh but not flowery.

Try enticing him right after you shower, but don’t add any feminine sprays or deoderants. Your yonni smells and tastes exactly as it should naturally. Let your man get to know that taste and like it.

3. Make it easy on him.

Get into a position that allows him to reach you without straining his neck. Put a pillow under your hips, and maybe another under his body. Or experiment with different positions — him on his back, you kneelling over him, for example.

4. Be responsive.

Okay, he’s finally taken the dive. GIVE HIM SOME FEEDBACK. Be vocal. Move. No man likes to work away at a woman who is totally unresponsive — it makes him feel like he doesn’t know what he’s doing (ego crusher!).

5. Run your fingers through his hair.

If he has hair on his head (Tee hee!). It feels nice, and it also tells him, “I’m paying attention, I’m loving this, and I’m loving you for doing this.”

6. Say thank you. Praise him.

Tell him he did a great job and you can’t wait for him to do it again. Be effusive. We’re assuming here that you’re happy to return the favor, by the way.

7. Find out why he doesn’t want to.

So you’ve made it abundantly clear that you want your husband down there. And he’s told you he doesn’t want to. Well … find out why! Talk about what’s keeping him back. It could be something you can solve. And if he’s wondering what he’d do down there, remind him that just being there is a huge pleasure and then maybe direct him to a men’s article with oral sex tips.

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Read more in The Stir

 

Op-ed pieces and contributions are the opinions of the writers only and do not represent the opinions of Y!/YNaija.