Every day on the Nigerian internet, there are people who keep our eyes glued to our phone screens as we read their funny rants, opinions, perspectives on political and social issues, etc. Sometimes, they are just downright ridiculous.

Here’s a roundup of the best we saw today:

One of my proudest moments has to be when I guessed an MTN recharge card number and got N400.

For the rest of that week I was feeling like Sherlock Holmes ??

— Aba Boy? (@Frank_LeanXV) September 18, 2019

I abhor this “best thing since sliced bread” statement. Who came up with it? I want to have words. Cos sliced bread isn’t that great so what gives?

— Dwin, The Stoic (@DwinTheStoic) September 18, 2019

Pilot rings in to say some passenger and has assaulted a member of the crew and we aren’t leaving till the man gets off the plane.

‘I’m sorry if I was harsh. I was pressed.’

People are saying ‘he has apologised naww’.

Lmao. Get him off the plane.

— Imhotep (@Kach_ache) September 18, 2019

This 10k charge ontop every 500k deposit will not trend heavy…why?

Because 90% of people who will read this tweet have never deposited 500k at once into their account in their entire lives.

— Ugwunna Ejikem (@UgwunnaEjikem) September 18, 2019

Thunder should strike me before I ask someone “how many retweets for a date?”

— Nnanna (@TheNnanna) September 18, 2019

a man and his wifewere at a park. The wife accidentally kills a butterfly. The man says, “Just because you killed the butterfly, you don’t get butter for a week.” They were there the next day, and the wife kills a cockroach. The father laughs and says, “Nice try.”

?

— ROGUE™ (@a_lootaa_) September 18, 2019