Every day on the Nigerian internet, there are people who keep our eyes glued to our phone screens as we read their rants, opinions, perspectives on political and social matters, etc. Sometimes, they are just downright ridiculous. We make it our job to take down the names of these noisemakers.

Here’s our list from today:

1 Christine Teigen

Ivanka Trump just proved the apple does not fall far from the tree. Months after her dad took the whole world by storm with his invention of “covfefe“, a word with multiple applications and yet no precise definition, Ivanka Trump did something interesting with the word “otherwise”, prompting the queen of clapbacks to give it to her.

Speaking for the rest of us:

Ivanka: "I don't know what 'otherwise' means." https://t.co/WUmPkUP283

— Kayleigh Donaldson (@Ceilidhann) September 19, 2017

2. Reno Omokri

Lai Mohammed may not be infamous for a grammar problem but he’s always been wobbly with the truth, hence Reno’s quip.

Sunday: 'Opposition is sponsoring IPOB'-Lai
Tuesday: 'Foreign nations are sponsoring IPOB'-Lai

Me: When you Lai you become inconsistent.

— Reno Omokri (@renoomokri) September 20, 2017

3. Mr Aye Dee

The Attorney General of the Federation finally approached the court to declare IPOB a terrorist organisation and it did. Aye Dee praises the FG:

#Kudos @AsoRock for finally doing the right thing … Declaring IPOB a terrorist organization VIA due process is the ONLY way to go…

— Mr. Aye Dee (@MrAyeDee) September 20, 2017

If IPOB does not like it, it can go to court…

— Mr. Aye Dee (@MrAyeDee) September 20, 2017

And yes, @AsoRock does NOT have to agree with secession demands, just like Spain isn't agreeing to Catalan's demands…

— Mr. Aye Dee (@MrAyeDee) September 20, 2017

Good! IPOB can now appeal. Let the battle move to the Courts as it should've been from day 1. https://t.co/Gqi6J37Woo

— Mr Stanley Nwabia (@MrStanleyNwabia) September 20, 2017

4. Adetutu Balogun

Gov Shettima is as we say in our local parlance, “feeling himself” too much, it would seem. Someone whose state has been devasted by the dreaded Boko Haram terrorist group suddenly thinks IPOB is the problem of Nigeria?

Nigerians tell him off:

Behold, a Gov that his state had endured these much Boko H killings in 2017:
Jan- 31
Feb-13
Mar- 17
Apr – 8
May- 27
Jun- 38
Jul- 105
Aug- 48 pic.twitter.com/dcBq8RQghU

— Adetutu Balogun (@Tutsy22) September 20, 2017

"IPoB crisis bigger than Boko Haram." – Borno Gov Kashim 'Chibok Girls' Shettima i.e. Pick pockets are more dangerous than mass murderers ?

— Babasola Kuti (@SKSolaKuti) September 20, 2017

Did Shettima really say IPOB is worse than Boko Haram? Sad if he did. Boko Haram killed over 20k people. How many people have IPOB killed?

— Reno Omokri (@renoomokri) September 20, 2017

5. Kingsley

Now that Diezani’s name has been struck out from one of the litany of charges brought against her, Kingsley has a question for the EFCC.

Diezani's name has been struck out from the corruption charges. ???? @officialEFCC what is happening? No money or building to show?

— Kingsley (@kingysly_01) September 20, 2017

Propaganda doesn't win cases in court. I don't know when EFCC and Lai Mohammed will learn.

Prove your case beyond every reasonable doubt!

— Miz Cazorla (@MizCazorla1) September 20, 2017

6. Favour

Nigerians are upset with DSTV for passing on televising the EPL matches. Everyone is being urged to ditch DSTV in favour of TSTV:

DSTV in trouble?

This is a welcome development. We need more competition to check the excesses of DSTV. pic.twitter.com/xA5ZBq0MoL

— Muhd Ibrahim Abba (@el_bonga) September 19, 2017

https://twitter.com/Rouvafe/status/910519533043175424

Dear Nigerians, let's support TSTV to give DSTV a good competition, Buy Naija to grow the Naira.

— AJALA JALINGO (@UNCLE_AJALA) September 20, 2017

If you are happy, DSTV now have a competitor retweet.
TSTV will launch on Oct. 1st 2017.
Guess what?
It's Pay Per View ??

— Kemi Ariyo (@d_problemsolver) September 20, 2017

7. Chydee

This is funny.

Bonus:

This story is a beautiful reminder that there’s justice in this world:

LMAO, my parents house help entered "one chance" last night. Unluckily for the bastards, the other passenger was a soldier in mufti

— Megatron (@miskoom) September 20, 2017

They pulled a knife on him. With unsportsmanlike conduct, he pulled a gun on them. ??

— Megatron (@miskoom) September 20, 2017

What's giving me joy is that, it's a soldier. No bribe will save those guys. If na Pol.. You know what, where's Ice Prince?! ?

— Megatron (@miskoom) September 20, 2017

The once chance entered one chance!! ?

— Tanwa Ashiru (@tanwaashiru) September 20, 2017

Wawu.