Every day on the Nigerian internet, there are people who keep our eyes glued to our phone screens as we read their rants, opinions, perspectives on political and social matters, etc. Sometimes, they are just downright ridiculous. We make it our job to take down the names of these noisemakers.

Here’s our list from today:

1 Olusegun Obasanjo

The former president and Godfather has a word for the youth:

Recently former president Olusegun Obasanjo is quoted as saying to youth, "Don’t wish us dead, you still need our mentoring." Thoughts?

— Tolu Adeleru Balogun (@tolulopeab) June 6, 2017

Do today's youth still need "mentoring" from those older, ie from former president Olusegun Obasanjo's generation? Join the convo on #MCLAG

— Tolu Adeleru Balogun (@tolulopeab) June 6, 2017

Reactions:

Who mentored them?
What they are doing is god-fatherism not mentorship.
They just want to be able to play God with Nigerians dazzall.

— Ndubueze (@ndgreat715) June 6, 2017

To everthing there is a season and time.

 

2. Lai Mohammed

Guess this is what Obasanjo meant by mentoring?

Oh my God, @osasuigbinedion why did you do this to our Lai Mohd?

WATCH this debate on the health of the president pic.twitter.com/aTHOtDDQ1V

— Adeyanju Deji ?? (@adeyanjudeji) June 6, 2017

Unfortunate.

 

3. Mr Aye Dee

Ummm, Oga OBJ, is this what what we stand to gain from this so-called mentorship?

Reactions:

This thing just tire me. So @MBuhari admin. can not create wealth. They have to borrow every single dime? https://t.co/A4Cgmad6MI

— UchIgbokwe (@ChrisOgemdi) June 6, 2017

Incompetent and clueless Governments have no ideas about development except to BORROW, BORROW, BORROW. https://t.co/BXp5S12D34

— Deji Teye (Sankarism) (@mydeji247) June 6, 2017

Nigeria needs to wake up.. https://t.co/f6i86gVqjj

— Suku Bishy (@obishyy) June 6, 2017

Yesterday.

 

4. Samuel Philip

Moving on…

It’s been Heartbreak Central on Twitter NG today over this simple question:

I don't think anyone has every asked this.

MEN; How did you find out your partner was cheating on you.

— Nimah A (@MsNemah) June 5, 2017

We got high together one day and then she started telling me about her boyfriend- (not me) like who? Whereas we've been dating for 4yrs ☹️ https://t.co/MwNSCDustw

— sc: awesomebillsam (@The_improviser) June 6, 2017

Reactions:

Hey God??

— adesuwa (@Pinkypixy) June 6, 2017

I'm sure your Highness cleared immediately pic.twitter.com/wh1EZ6JBsK

— Ayo (@flipzyDon) June 6, 2017

Social media outs the cheater

she ws showing me pics of a wedding she attended when the bbm message came in threes and fours at a time, still good friends tho.

— Ólakúnlé Abióla Sómóyè (@MrSomoye) June 6, 2017

True to life?

An Igbo girl cheated on me and i trekked 5KM on a hot afternoon.

Thats how hard their own cheating can hit you.

— Patriarchy Princess (@BiggieMonzie) June 6, 2017

Abeg just say you wanted to lose weight. Leave Igbo girls out of it https://t.co/fGcEmZh2j2

— Chinny Ugegbe Oyibo (@Nwanlecha1) June 6, 2017

5. Osarumen Osamuyi

She came to spend the night at mine, and used my laptop to check her FB profile. I came back into the room and unlocked my laptop, and /1

— Osarumen Osamuyi (@SkweiRd) June 6, 2017

I was greeted with her Message box. She was telling a medical doctor that worked with her mum that she just can’t stop loving him and /2

— Osarumen Osamuyi (@SkweiRd) June 6, 2017

describing (in detail) what she was going to do to him once she got the chance. I left the laptop unlocked and placed it on the table so /3

— Osarumen Osamuyi (@SkweiRd) June 6, 2017

she’d know I’d seen it, then I went to sleep. Context: she was 3 years older than me and had told me that the doctor was “disturbing” her /4

— Osarumen Osamuyi (@SkweiRd) June 6, 2017

friends, and was flirting with another at the time. It was a pretty interesting time, lmao. We’re pretty good friends now though. /6

— Osarumen Osamuyi (@SkweiRd) June 6, 2017

Reactions:

You sir are a WAY better man than me.

— Tiste Azathanai (@MallamSawyerr) June 6, 2017

I'm deeply sorry for what y'all have been through

— Nellrneste (@Nellrneste1) June 6, 2017

Cheating is the menu on the TL today. Is today a public holiday? Did I miss the memo?

— Tochukwu (@Tokwonna) June 6, 2017

From terrible unemployment report yesterday to cheating topic today. There's a link.

Unemployed people have too much time to cheat? ?

— Ayobami (@dondekojo) June 6, 2017

Some Men really endure emotional pain in silence. I really hope tweeting about being cheated on was therapeutic for y'all

— Nigerian God (@Echecrates) June 6, 2017

 

 

6. Fat Daddy

The sweetest thing ever. WATCH:

nah bro, this is beautiful pic.twitter.com/0Jm7Y8wS5M

— Fat Daddy (@iamFatPapi) June 6, 2017

7. Freddy

And this too:

https://twitter.com/FreddyAmazin/status/872067329374531584