You do your best not to flirt back as you know his wife and know that she is a very nice person. He will tell his wife that you are friends so that it doesn’t make it look like he is cheating.

No matter how much they trust their man, married women often get a bit miffed at the fact that their husband has single female friends. This is with good reason, most of the time, because it seems that some men just can’t help themselves, whether they are married or not. They will tell you that they have been looking for someone just like you, but then they go out and flirt with other women.

[REASON 1: Men can’t help themselves]

Let’s say you are a single woman, and a male friend asks you out for drinks after work. You have known him for a while and feel like you are close friends, so you accept. This is how it starts. He will begin flirting with you. He may be shy at first, but eventually he will “grow a pair” and be more direct. He will start telling you that he saw something or read something the other day that reminded him of you. Don’t be fooled because this man is planting the seed for an affair with you.

[REASON 2: Men flirt and flirt till they wear the lady down]

David Wygant, Dating and relationship coach and author says:

“So, how do you spot this guy right from the beginning? Well, he’s usually the guy you meet who immediately wants to be your “friend.” Yet, these men aren’t just friends with women. They’re only friends with women they’re attracted to. Because that’s how it starts — with a mental affair. He’ll frame your interaction as business, like, “Hey, let’s have a business dinner,” or “Hey, let’s grab a drink after work.” He’ll flirt with you in ways that seem all so innocent. But let me tell you something: It’s not. Because this so-called “happily married man” is not happy.”

[REASON 3: The men are cunning, the come like innocent friendship, then manipulate things to get what they want]

As the night wears on you notice your guy friend getting closer and closer to you. He is flirting more intensely. You do your best not to flirt back as you know his wife and know that she is a very nice person. He will tell his wife that you are friends so that it doesn’t make it look like he is cheating.

[REASON 4: The men deceive their wives into relaxing about the friendship, so the number 1 person to raise alarm doesn’t]

These are classic signs of a married man that is not satisfied with his married life, so he is going to try and get a little something on the side to make himself feel better. He is not going to leave his wife for you, so don’t even travel down that road because it will only end up in heartache. If you encounter such a man, run in the other direction, maybe towards someone who is worthy of all of your time.

[REASON 5: Man just wants to feel ‘good’ by getting something on the side outside his marriage]

In the end, you will find that a lot of women who get into relationships with married men did not set out to date one; they just fell into the trap of a cunning married man.

[SUMMARY: The single girls fall victim to the married men’s cunning ways]

Of course there are women who avoid intimacy and commitment by dating married men. Then there are those who go after “rich” men, regardless of whether they are married or not. But the next time you see a woman who is dating a married man, consider that she may have fallen prey to a tricky married man who knew what he was doing all along.

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Read more: Healthy Black Woman

 

Op-ed pieces and contributions are the opinions of the writers only and do not represent the opinions of Y!/YNaija.