Careful not to get into another relationship as a rebound, I took some time to carefully reflect and be the best of me. I forgave Yetunde, which is one of the best decisions I made.

The day looked promising. Only three days ago, I had boasted of how beautiful I and Yetunde were doing. I had told a group of close friends how understanding she had been about my financial challenges which were a result of some wrong decisions I had made at that time. I was excited. Excited until I received a text from her saying she wanted out. I couldn’t comprehend it. Was it something I did or was she trying to test my love for her? I honestly didn’t know what to think. I had never been hit this hard before. I tried singing a few songs of consolation then proceeded to call Yetunde. “Yetunde, what is the issue? Did you really send that message?” I said calmly expecting to hear her laugh and say it was only a joke. But, disappointment was what I met. She said calmly but sternly “What I wrote in that message is what I want”. After moments of silence from shock, the call ended.

I decided to pay Yetunde a visit. When we saw, the look on her face was that of someone whose mind was made up. I pleaded with her and tried to know if it was something I did wrong. She reiterated that I had done nothing wrong and that she just wanted out. I was heartbroken and sobbed in confusion.

Weeks after, I was still trying to find out what had gone wrong. I called Yetunde over and over again. Most times, my calls were ignored. And when she finally picked, she said ignoring them was deliberate. It was two months of torture. Finally, Yetunde opened up. There was another guy. I was more disappointed. I thought what we had for each other was stronger than that.

Careful not to get into another relationship as a rebound, I took some time to carefully reflect and be the best of me. I forgave Yetunde, which is one of the best decisions I made. Forgiveness does not mean you are stupid, it only means you are deciding not to give the other person the power to control your emotions and actions. Forgiveness is truly divine. It frees you to see a brighter and better perspective. It releases you to see a whole new world of possibilities and experiences. That was what forgiveness did for me.

I and Aderonke began to get close. She was a friend with whom I could discuss anything and everything. In her, I found love. Love I could never have been creative enough to ask for.

Looking back now, I am so excited! Why would I have settled for Yetunde when God had Aderonke in mind for me? When I found Aderonke, I found somebody who I had been looking for all my life. I thought I loved Yetunde until I met Aderonke, she is just perfect. All that I loved in Yetunde, Aderonke had in a multiplied measure and much more. She is the Queen I have always wanted and the woman of my dreams. What I tried to keep with Yetunde I would die to keep with Aderonke. Even though Yetunde later wanted us back, I could not trade Aderonke for anything or anyone. What I had found in Aderonke was all I wanted in a woman and more. I am so grateful to Yetunde for letting me go so I could find the woman I had always prayed for that she was not but I initially thought she was. I am so glad I forgave and moved on.

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Joshua Ademuwagun is a speaker, writer, author, trainer, project manager, leadership expert with years of business transformation experience. He holds two Masters Degrees: One in International Law and Diplomacy from the University of Lagos and the other in Divinity from Grace Springs Bible College and Seminary. He serves as the lead, Strategy and Product development for The Professor Smart Company and the Principal of Pottersworld Communications. He is also a Program Manager/Senior Executive Assistant to the Chairperson at the Initiative for Education and Environmental Development and an Associate at the Household of David.

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30 Days 30 Voices series is an opportunity for young Nigerians to share their stories and experiences with other young Nigerians, within our borders and beyond, to inspire and motivate them.

 

Op-ed pieces and contributions are the opinions of the writers only and do not represent the opinions of Y!/YNaija.