“My husband travels for work a lot, so I’ll often send along a sexy love note explaining what I can’t wait to do to him when he gets home
When the sex begins to dwindle (it will) and the obligations start to pile up (they do), rather than settle, sweetly shock your husband.
Give him a date, not an obligation
Celebrate him for no reason
Men like to feel like king of the castle, but often consider themselves neglected between the carpooling, cleaning and cooking. “Anytime a man feels like he’s needed and respected, it makes him feel good,” says Julie Orlov, psychotherapist, relationship builder and author of The Pathway to Love. Gather a few friends and family and cook his favorite dinner; it shows him how important he is to you, that you love him, and that you appreciate what good care he takes care of you and the family. The meal doesn’t need to be a 10-course extravaganza, but since he often ends up eating what’s on your current diet plan or the kids’ mac n’’ cheese, whipping up what he loves feels truly special.
Make a “thank you” list
Over time, it’s normal to begin to take for granted all the little things your husband does to keep the house going, like always mowing the lawn or taking out the trash. But doing this can make men feel like they’re clocking in and out of a second job. Make a “thank you” list and write out everything you’re grateful for — or better yet, make a big display of giving him a kiss on the cheek for a job well done. Science proves that being generous, whether with kisses, appreciation, or compliments, makes couples feel “very happy” together, according to a recent study from University of Virginia’s National Marriage Project. That generous “thank you” will make him feel like a hero for the day — which is exactly what he craves.
Get out of your sexual comfort zone
For most women, the obstacle to breaking out of sexual humdrum is not being able to relax, so Carin Goldstein, marriage and family therapist and founder of Be the Smart Wife, suggests stepping outside of your comfort zone — literally. According to a recent study by Trojan Brand Condoms, 32 percent of Americans have had sex outdoors, with one in three having hooked up on the beach or at a friend’s place and one in four at their in-laws’ house. If you’re one of the 68 percent who hasn’t, it’s time to get out of your rut.
Repair his beloved, well-worn objects
Plan a surprise getaway
Send him on a guys weekend
Leave him sexy love notes — or photos
It sounds simple, but hear us out. With flooded inboxes and constant texts, receiving an actual hand-written, slightly naughty note is pretty special. “My husband travels for work a lot, so I’ll often send along a sexy love note explaining what I can’t wait to do to him when he gets home. I’m not above sending a photo via Snapchat of me in my unmentionables,” says Stephanie Costa of Austin, TX of the iPhone and Android app that allows you to control how long someone can view an image before it’s automatically deleted.
Indulge his hobby
Whether he’s obsessed with a football team, fishing, or paintball, indulging a guy’s passion can make him feel like a million bucks. Although many women think these activities are their man’s chance be away from them, participating — sometimes, not always — is great for your marriage. Olov suggests surprising your hubby by taking a ski lesson or going to the game with him once in awhile. “Whatever you do, whether it’s golf or hiking, do it with enthusiasm.”
Initiate in the bedroom
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Op-ed pieces and contributions are the opinions of the writers only and do not represent the opinions of Y!/YNaija.
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