by Toluwanimi Onakoya
More and more women over the past weeks have been coming out to share sexual allegations and their own sexual assault stories. This has come against the backdrop of the nationwide cry over the rape and murder of Uwa, and the sexual assault of Jennifer as well.
Yesterday, notable talent manager, Mayowa Balogun published a statement confessing that he had violated his former partner, Nelo, and had secretly recorded her during sex. Nelo, replied with a pointed statement, sharing her perspective and calling Mayowa manipulative for his actions.
I am not letting this man take my own power away from me. Nice try with the “confession”
— khaleesi. (@KingNelo13) June 8, 2020
Nelo, @KingNelo13, published her statement explaining her experience on what happened. She explains that the perpetrator, Mayowa Balogun @sweeegu, and herself had previously engaged in consensual sex while they were together. During the act, he taped them without her knowledge. She stumbled upon this fact the next day when she tried to record something on his phone and discovered that he had sent a “sex tape” of them to three of his contacts.
She confronted him about it and he had a supposed reaction of admittance of guilt. She claimed he manipulated her with his words and she eventually thought there was nothing wrong with what he had done. He had confessed to her that he was in a group chat where they constantly shared nude pictures and sex tapes of girls they’ve secretly recorded.
She claims she even gaslighted herself into thinking that it was okay, rationalising it as though she would have consented to a sex tape anyway so it wasn’t a big deal. She explains that it wasn’t until time had passed and she had started engaging in female empowerment activism did she realise that he violated her. She explains that even though she realised that he had assaulted her in a way, she refrained from bringing up the matter in the public space so it won’t reflect on him and the musicians he worked with. She shared her story in private, to empower girls she talked to.
She also proceeded to say he had made no attempts to warn her before releasing a statement. That he had in fact blocked her on all platforms and labelled her sharing her story as a form of “threat.”
Mayowa’s step to share a statement on the matter without talking to her about the issue since it happened, pushed her to bring it to the view of the public. She claims he has not only stripped her of her privacy but her ability to share her story.
Mayowa had earlier shared a statement detailing the encounter, which he has long deleted. He claimed he had been anxious about the event and felt the need to bring it to public light. He corroborates what she said and admits to guilt and regret. He claims he didn’t realise that what he did was wrong until the #MeToo movement and that even though he’s apologised to Nelo he still feels guilt and it has gotten to the point in which he feels the need to confess.
This is the original post from Mayowa now deleted.
– Notice the intro
– notice the admit of fear and anxiety not actual remorse
– notice the manipulation
– notice the attempt at “forgiveness card”
– notice the way he leveraged our nonexistent friendship
I was not warned. pic.twitter.com/we8tw38w8g
— khaleesi. (@KingNelo13) June 9, 2020
Many Twitter users showed remorse for Nelo and ushered a torrent of support. A lot of them accused Mayowa of being manipulative, for not reaching out to her first before posting the statement.
His “confession” was so calculated and manipulative. Who confesses to twitter and not have a conversation with their victim? Who on twitter is going to determine your “punishment” or “forgiveness”. Girl, hope he sees you in civil court and sorry this happened to you
— Ozzy Etomi (@ozzyetomi) June 9, 2020
Mayowa did not give her any choice or respect when he recorded and shared a video of them. He also had the nerve to publicly share her story without so much as notifying her. There’s no excuse for any of it.
— period partner (@duchesskk) June 9, 2020
Some have even urged Nelo to seek justice by taking the matter to the court of law.
I’m sorry you had to go through this. You should speak to a lawyer to bring him to justice. I know @Omojuwa was on a similar case of recorded sex for someone so he may help. That he confessed to doing it makes everything easy. Please seek justice via the courts.
— Oluseun (@akin_oluseun) June 9, 2020
Some turned their gaze to Lady Donli, who had been accused in Nelo’s statement of knowing the events that took place and not doing anything about it. They express disappointment that Lady Donli continues to be represented by him.
Lady Donli was just here posting links on why the Brymo accusations should never be forgotten.
Only for us to know on the timeline that the Mayowa guy on her team is an offender she still associates with even after knowing that.
Nothing wey person never see..
— Olúṣẹ́gun | Agba! (@the_olusegun) June 9, 2020
That Lady Donlii continues to be represented by Mayowa Balogun even after she found out he recorded and shared video of his partner during Sex without her consent is not good. She knows better. However, she is not the person who committed the crime here. Mayowa Balogun did.
— Panda (@Rimzzzeee) June 9, 2020
There are others however, on the opposing fence saying there’s nothing wrong with what Mayowa did. That since she had already started sharing the story to others, it is only right that he gets to share it as well.
She already told many people the story and shared on Twitter without mentioning his name. There is nothing manipulative in what Mayowa did. The story is his as much as it is hers.
She wanted the right to shame him but dude admitted the crime and is ready for the punishment. https://t.co/uSXKO3hnYb
— Sir Dickson (@Wizarab10) June 9, 2020
UcheNelo dragged Mayowa for dragging sake and nothing more. Everything she narrated is no different from what Mayowa stated in his confession note, so what's the point of ”i won’t let this man take my power away from me”????
I don't get that part🤷♂️
— November 3RD! (@peaksog) June 9, 2020
Toluwanimi Onakoya is a spirited writer, creative and videographer. Her biggest drive is to connect with people and depict tales using various forms of media.
Toluwanimi is available on Instagram and Twitter @nimi_onaks