Forget the election, your job comes first – 7 important things you didn’t read yesterday (but should have)

by Kolapo Olapoju

1. Fake teachers with fake certificates.

Some fake teachers who have been on the payroll of Kogi state, have been caught… not before earning N30 million of course.

The teachers, who used fake certificates to carry out the scam, were discovered after the conclusion of the verification exercise conducted by the state government.


2. The gay marriage that never happened.

The love between male lovers, Farouk and Abba will not translate to marriage anytime soon… as their first attempt was cut short.

The Hisbah Sharia court, has arrested the husband, Farouk, after they tried to get married in Kano.

The wife, however, fled and left his husband to face the law... he is the man after all.


3. Forget voting, the job comes first.

Some Nigerian artists, who are role models of millions of youths, won’t be voting at the presidential elections… because they have a job to do.

Basketmouth will be leading Nigerian stars like Wizkid, Olamide, Patoranking, Buchi, Osama, Aje Baba and others to the GT Bank-sponsored concert scheduled to hold at the famous Apollo Hall in London.\


4. AIT’s presidential poll suffers ‘premature disappearance’.

Silverbird TV suffers technical issues while Festus Keyamo was dissing Jonathan, and now, AIT allegedly takes down an uncompleted poll.

African Independent Television (AIT) started an online poll on the race between Buhari and Jonathan, and while the former was leading… the page went under maintenance.

On Tuesday, January 27, after Buhari’s lead rose to 79%, it went amiss, mysteriously.


5. GEJ’s aides get airlifted, soldiers left trapped.

We appreciate you for fighting for your country, but on our scale of preference, the president’s aides are more important.

We hear over 500 soldiers who fled from Monguno as Islamist insurgents attacked the town three days ago are now stranded in Maiduguri, Borno state.

“Some of us had finished all our bullets and we didn’t have spare ones, so that is why we left Monguno. On getting to headquarters [Maimalari barracks] they refused to clear us. Please how can we fight when we are not empowered?”


6. Afenifere turns its back on Tinubu.

Yoruba socio-political group, Afenifere, has turned its back on Asiwaju Bola Tinubu, to endorse President Goodluck Jonathan for re-election.

It gave its endorsement at a meeting of its members with the President at the residence of Afenifere leader, Chief Reuben Fasanranti in Akure on Tuesday.

Spokesman for the group, Yinka Odumakin, told reporters after the meeting that the endorsement was predicated on the President’s commitment to implementing the recommendations of report of the National Conference 2014.


7. Agbaje, the man of the people.

Jimi Agbaje has yet again, pledged to work for everybody, regardless of social standing… or bank account

The governorship candidate of the Peoples Democratic Party in Lagos state, says: “When I talk about change, I do so through the prism of interacting with ordinary people. Government has to Change. Government must work not just for the elite but for the unconnected, the regular man on the streets, the artisan, the market woman, the school teacher, the service man.”

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