Opeyemi Akande: The trouble with handsome guys (30 Days, 30 Voices)


If there’s something I’ve come to learn in this campus, it’s that girls who are in relationships with undeserving guys always have a problem getting out of it…

The door of the room burst open, Titi my roommate ran in all tear-faced and crying,
“What’s up, are you okay?” I asked as she collapsed on the bed. “Why are you crying?” I asked, as I dropped the novel I had been reading on my bed and walked to her.
“It’s Michael again!” she spat. Michael again! I thought as I sat down next to her waiting to hear the rest of the story. Michael or ‘malware’ as I liked to call him, in my mind was the worm that had completely taken over my roommate’s heart and had caused her so much pain, in my opinion, since they started dating. While I waited for her to tell me all about it I began imagining what Michael could have done this time as different scenarios messed around in my head, the same way it does with Ally in the Ally McBeal Show . First I saw him turning into a monster right beside Titi, just like Michael Jackson in the Thriller video, and then I saw him again at the back of the school cafeteria engaging in a smooch fest with one of his female course mates. I came back to reality from my daydream and heard Titi speak. “I saw him with a girl in his room and they were…” She couldn’t finish the sentence and I couldn’t speak the words on my lips which were, I told you so. This wasn’t the first time Titi had caught her boyfriend with another lady but she never learns and I don’t know what to do with her.

Michael the ‘malware’ was a 4th year law student in the university while my roommate and I were in our 2nd year studying Mass Communication. Malicious software, also known as malware is software designed to deliberately harm your computer. I call Michael a malware because I believe his purpose with respect to girls on campus is never good. His reputation as a playboy is well known and my roomie has a thing for handsome playboys that I just do not understand. Malicious software can come in form of a worm (program) that can make it possible for a malicious user to take over your computer and cause your computer, network or server to stop responding. Okay, so Michael has this smile and it just worms its way up to your heart and if your heart does not have an updated anti-virus software or a firewall that prevents hackers from gaining access into it, then you are vulnerable to attack. “I’ll never have anything to do with him again its over between us”, she said in between sobs bringing me out of my reverie. This is the final straw, I’ve broken up with him, I’m getting my life back on track and I’m no longer wasting my tears on him, he’s not worth it.”

I watched as she got up from the bed and began changing her clothes. I was happy for her; at last this girl was finally acting or at least talking like she has some sense, I thought. Maybe someone somewhere has helped install an anti-spyware or antivirus software that got rid of whatever virus or worm Michael must have put in her heart.

However my happiness for her was to be short-lived as three weeks later my roomie told me that she had gotten back together with Michael a week after the break up and that she felt guilty for not telling me earlier. I may not be an expert on relationships but I know that guys who find it difficult to discipline themselves when it comes to women, money and wine can never make a good girl happy. Michael sure lacks control when it comes to these three things. My roomie was just too good to be falling for this type of guy.
“Are you sure about what you are doing?” I asked her. “You know this is not the first time Michael cheated on you neither is it the second. He does it always and everybody on campus knows about his escapades. Besides he is not a Christian like you and the bible says that we should not be unequally yoked with an unbeliever. Titi this guy will just continue to break your heart. Do you really want to live like that?”

My roomie was mad.

“Please don’t go scriptural on me because I know what I’m doing” she said. “I love Michael and I know he loves me too. He just has a problem with ladies as they always come after him because he’s rich, handsome and one of the most popular guys in school. He loves me and only me and he has promised that he’ll never cheat on me again. Besides the same Bible says that love is patient and kind, keeps no record of when it has been wronged, never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful and endures through all circumstances. I love him and I’m ready to stand by him through this trying time. Thanks for your advice anyway, I believe I have a class to attend.” With that she walked out of the room and if she had turned around, she would have seen my gaping mouth.

If there’s something I’ve come to learn in this campus, it’s that girls who are in relationships with undeserving guys always have a problem getting out of it and they always believe it is their duty to keep the relationships going. They allow these guys ease of access into their lives and bodies and they always find it difficult to let go.

My roommate has foolishly uninstalled her firewall and has allowed this malicious software into her heart to take over and cause her to gradually stop responding to the voice of reason.

Like a friend would say “Beware of handsome guys (worms) they can be quite slippery!” Hmmn!


Opeyemi Akande is a seasoned photographer who loves to write in her spare time. She tweets from @O_OpeAK.

30 Days 30 Voices series is an opportunity for young Nigerians from across the world to share their stories and experiences – creating a meeting point where our common humanity is explored.

Op-ed pieces and contributions are the opinions of the writers only and do not represent the opinions of Y!/YNaija.

Comments (7)

  1. Ope oooooooo… The truth is a double edged sword o; it swings both ways. I however agree with you on the main points in the article. Bless u!

  2. Nice write Opeak. Campus relationships and their drama. “Micheal the Malware” LMAO.

  3. a really interesting piece but a familiar story line…guess somethings will never change as regards the boy – girl matter. I also, enjoyed the writers creativity in terms of her inner imaginations in the article (the Ally McBeal thingy) …also found the computer language/s quite enlightening, Mal-ware and co…. keep it up opeyemi. hope to read more from you

  4. Its a pity people have to go through so much pain all in the name of selfless love.
    But just to chip in, the ‘malware’ comes in different both sexes. L̳̿Ö̤̣̇☺ː̗̀(=)))ː̖́☺Ö̤̣̇L̳̿‎​!
    Nice peace. I follow the writer on twitter and her blog too. Awesome stuff. Am a fan.

  5. I really feel sorry for your friend,and at the same time don’t feel sorry for her,as handsome as I am,I have also dated a girl who was very pretty,and she messed up,I have always said the greatest mistake anyone can do is letting your boyfriend or girl friend know the reason why they love u,cos they will capitalize on it,and then break your heart,for example if the guy is very rich, very tall and handsome,and you like him because he is rich of all the qualities he have,then as a girl u begin to demand for stupid and life threatening things,obviously he knows u are after his money,then he will demand stupid things from you too,he might tell u to leave lecture room for s*x,after all he has the money,so just keep your calm,and love him naturally,and don’t force yourself on the guy,that’s one stupid thing most girls do,if he doesn’t love u,don’t force it,obviously ur friend likes his money and fine face,so she’s dancing to the music,let her face it,wen he guy gives her HIV she will wake up…I pray it doesn’t lead tho!

  6. Nice stories i have read in this space. Please, what must i do to get my articles and stories published on your blog?

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