Opinion: Maybe the problem is with parents of nowadays

by Auwal Anwar

Alvarado, Cassandre 2009

I sat down to remember how my childhood was so different. My parents were too busy eking a living to bother about my wants or if any teacher had smacked me at school. As long as they had provided the basics, I was on my own. No Disney Junior, no Cartoon Network, no coco pops but pap, no driver to school, no Bobo and no crackers. With at most five pencils, a couple of sharpeners and two erasers per term, they considered me settled. And incredibly, I turned out just fine. Now I am thinking, may be the problem is not ‘the children of nowadays’. May be it is ‘the parents of nowadays.’ Think about it.

‘A for Iron, B for Ben 10, C for Pirates and D for Disney Junior…’ That was my ‘creative’ three-year-old under the mischievous tutelage of her seven-year-old brother.

For those who have children or who are living with children, these must be interesting times. I came back to my house after two hours out and knocked on the door. It took about three minutes for the door to be opened. The house-help welcomed me in; my wife was still at work. My two children’s standard operating procedure is to meet me at the door to welcome me while checking the contents of my bag. ‘What have you got for us?’ my little girl will always ask. But today, I entered the sitting room only to find them sleeping on the sofa. The television was tuned to Disney Junior. It was 4 pm. Something was wrong. I knew what to do. I then asked the house-help, ‘Do we still have ice cream in the fridge?’ ‘Yes!’ my sleeping little girl rang out, with eyes closed. And then the brother added, ‘Vanilla flavour is there. But the coconut and chocolate are finished. Let me get the vanilla for you.’ And before I could say, ‘Were you guys not sleeping?’ they had reached the kitchen. Children of nowadays.

I went to the room, dropped my office aids and changed into something informal. By the time I got back to the sitting room, the television channel had changed to Cartoon Network; the ice cream bowl was on the floor, close to the television, and four cups with four spoons were idling near the bowl, for me, the two kids and the house-help. Unfortunately for the brother, I had worked out why I found them ‘sleeping’. I remembered that I had given him a writing assignment to do before going out, which I now suspected was not done. ‘Okay,’ I began, ‘before I dish out this ice cream, can you show me your assignment?’ His face went blank. ‘He did not do it,’ the sister answered excitedly. ‘She said I should turn on the television for her. She said she wanted Disney Junior.’ ‘No, I did not.’ ‘Yes you did.’ ‘No, I did not.’ ‘Yes, you did.’ And it went on forever. ‘I wanted to welcome you but he said we should pretend to be sleeping because he did not do the homework,’ she managed to explain between his protests. My final word was to ask him to go to his room and do the assignment before getting his share of the ice cream.

Thirty minutes later, I did not hear from him. That was unusual. He was always very fast to finish assignments especially when there was ice cream at the end of the tunnel. So I went to his room to check. He was sleeping! I could not believe it. I woke him up. I was angry. The story was that when he got to the room, he could not find his pencil and so ‘while checking all the other places, [he] didn’t know when [he] fell asleep.’ My hand went up to gain momentum before smacking him, but he rolled into the far corner, curled into a bundle, covered his face and said, ‘Please don’t beat me. I didn’t see it. It is not in this house.’ ‘You mean there is no pencil in this house?’ I asked, my hands reaching into the corner to pull him out. ‘I… I did not see my bag,’ he had started crying, ‘I… I forgot it in the class, at school!’

Those are the kids of nowadays. You wake up early in the morning and get them ready for school. They have options of what to eat for breakfast before leaving: tea, bread with butter and jam, omelette, Coco pops, corn flakes, rice krispies, etc. This is first breakfast. The second breakfast will be taken at school for which you must have provided, Capri-sonne or Bobo or Sip it and crackers or wafers or biscuits or toasts in the backpack. With five or more sets of uniforms (one per day), countless pairs of sandals, socks and sweaters; and neatly dressed, you drive them to school, or the driver drives them to school. Sometimes you buy textbooks that you never get to see again; your child gives them out because, ‘My father will buy for me again.’ With their consumption rate of one pencil, one sharpener and one ruler per day, per child, you become best friends with the bookshop owner. In fact, you have to buy bundles of these things to give to the teacher and to keep at home. God helps the teacher that dared to discipline your child. You or your wife will show up in the school, breathing fire, wanting to ‘see the headmaster’.

I sat down to remember how my childhood was so different. My parents were too busy making a living to bother about my wants or if any teacher had smacked me at school. As long as they had provided the basics, I was on my own. No Disney Junior, no Cartoon Network, no coco pops but pap, no driver to school, no Bobo and no crackers. With at most five pencils, a couple of sharpeners and two erasers per term, they considered me settled. And incredibly, I turned out just fine. Now I am thinking, may be the problem is not ‘the children of nowadays’. May be it is ‘the parents of nowadays.’ Think about it.

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Read this article in the Leadership Newspapers
Op-ed pieces and contributions are the opinions of the writers only and do not represent the opinions of Y!/YNaija.

 

Comments (3)

  1. Mr Auwal you forgot to mention that we don’t even let them wash any of d five pairs of uniform they have let alone d ice cream bowls,let d house help do that,never mind that they may b the same age as the help. Methinks we r cheating our children all in the name of “love”. Thanks for d write up it’4 time parents examined their relationship with their children.

  2. I believe u are right. The problem is parents want to give their kids everything they didn’t have as kids. 4getting that cos dey didn’t have wat the wanted was part of the reason they fought to get where dey re now. My little nephew says he doesn’t need to stress himself cos he wud work in his father’s company. The questions is where do u draw the line between giving ur kids the best and spoiling them? Give them somfin dey can’t have to fight for. I tell my kids u want dat toy u have to work 4 me(aside their chores) 4 a period of time (depending on the price of the toy) even up to a year and guess wat dey gladly do it. Now they want somfin they come up wit a plan for wat dey can do for me and how long. Make ur kids work 2day cos u won’t always be here.

  3. Lol! Dis is hilarious and yet so true!

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