Every day on the Nigerian internet, there are people who keep our eyes glued to our phone screens as we read their rants, opinions, perspectives on political and social issues, etc. Sometimes, they are just downright ridiculous. Here are the ones we saw today:

I’m served some salads in this UK & I just feel like the person who prepared them entered bush, picked leaves from 10 random trees, washed them, then added cucumber & tomato & presented it beautifuly.

Because I don’t understand why I’ll be served leaves.

Ewure ni mi ni?

— Ọmọ Yiko (@OsaremeE) September 10, 2019

Dangote: I like your girlfriend, l will give you 50million naira, I want to marry her

GF: Don’t mind o, don’t listen to him , I know you love me

Me: Sir, cash or transfer

— Abrantie (@ayotunde_teejah) September 10, 2019

if federal SARS stops you on the road and you’re trying to claim right, dem go left you.

— Biyi The Plug ? (@BiyiThePlug) September 10, 2019

First Bieber now Weeknd, Selena Gomez touches your life and at some point you’ll start looking like a drug dealer

— F A I T H (@Retiredsars) September 10, 2019

if your deodorant is 24hour or 48 hour, who cares??‍♀️ The thing is, you’re still gonna apply it once a day.

— #RoastMe (@llcoolstain) September 10, 2019

What does “I showed you my nipple” mean as men?

50 points.

— Written By (@DamiElebe) September 10, 2019