How To: Control your sex drive

by Ore Fakorede

Most red-blooded males have a natural desire to have sex. This urge is more cranked-up in some of us, manifesting in a keen hunger to tap any and every booty that strays into our fields of vision. While that’s all good for the masculine ego and predatory sense, the ability to keep ‘Mini Me’ on a tight leash is becoming more  of a necessity than an esoteric virtue. With STDs running wild and marriage vows to protect, you’ll probably want to keep your pants on more often than not. Here’s how to stay zipped-up.

1. Look less!
There’s a Yoruba proverb that pretty much says: you don’t smell food you won’t eat. We’ll take that a little further – you don’t look at, pick up or smell food you won’t eat. Although checking-out babes is perfectly acceptable in most male-centric social circles, running your eyes over the opposite sex’s choice body parts is not healthy for your mind. Your eyes save every image that they see and you’ll often find yourself processing all that raw data much later (to your own detriment). Don’t look too hard. Admire only in the passing, a cursory glance would suffice. And to all those men that stare at women’s breasts while talking to them: stop giving us bad press!

2. Watch what you watch!
If you’ve been following this series diligently, you’ve probably gotten rid of your ‘enviable’ porn collection. If you haven’t, you really should. Feasting your eyes on nudity and moral decadence isn’t going to help you control your drive to get laid. Your excuse might be that porno helps you release sexual tension, but we all know that jerking-off only makes things worse. Read a Time magazine or watch a PG-13 romantic comedy instead. Live on the non-sensual side of life and you’ll ride the sex train less often.

3. Talk to yourself!
Not in that queer way that’s a definite sign of growing insanity, but in a self-motivating, instructive manner. Constantly remind yourself of every reason you have not to indulge in casual sex- the fear of God’s fiery indignation, a girlfriend with an eagle eye for lipstick stains, a loving wife, Big Brother, ethics. . . whatever. The more genuine reasons you can give yourself for talking a stand, the more firmly-rooted you’ll become. Believe in your beliefs!

4. Move with the right crowd!
Even though our parents would argue otherwise (selfishly.lol), peer influence persists throughout life. We often find that the things that are acceptable in our social groups become acceptable to us no matter how much we try to resist. Humans are naturally afraid of rejection, so we always seek to conform and blend-in. Moralists that wind up in bad company migrate slowly from resisting to sitting on the fence to becoming adopters of inordinate practices. If you can’t beat them, run away from them. Friends who love wild parties, bar-hopping and clubbing won’t help your resolve to be chaste. Don’t try to convert your unruly friends, just change them.

5. Find some stability!
No man is an island, and if you’re not gay, you’ll find that you need some female company every now and then. Decide if what you want is a girlfriend or a best friend (knowing full well that with the latter, there are lines you must NEVER cross). If you’ve been paying any attention, you won’t want to spend time with a girl who can’t wait to take you down. If she keeps talking about how comfortable her apartment it compared to yours, run! More seriously now, find a girl you can regularly spend time doing productive, non-sexual things with. It could be a mutual love for sports, movies or video games, anything that gets the two of you excited, keeps you busy and wears you out at the end of the day is perfect. Keep it ‘monogamous’, not monotonous – same girl, different activites. Remember that it doesn’t have to be romantic, but don’t shut the door on love.

6. Think right!
Thinking about sex is the most dangerous kind of pornography. Your mind paints better pictures than a movie or magazine can provide, and the more you imagine IT, the more you’ll want to to do IT. Practice mind control. Work-out an issue in your head, think about solutions to problems you’re facing at work, identify ways to make your life better or develop business ideas. Positive thinking will help keep your mind out of trouble. Don’t give up when your thoughts stray, just reign them in and move on to pure things. The mind is a terrible thing to waste (on sex).

What else works? Go ahead and share, the world is waiting!

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