Every day on the Nigerian internet, there are people who keep our eyes glued to our phone screens as we read their rants, opinions, perspectives on political and social matters, etc. Sometimes, they are just downright ridiculous. We make it our job to take down the names of these noisemakers.
Here’s our list from today:
1 Justin Gaitlin
Are we looking at Usain Bolt’s replacement? Gaitlin just won the 100M World Championship race. This was supposed to be Bolt’s final individual race and fans came in their numbers to watch him go out unbeaten, but alas, the gold was stolen by another.
https://twitter.com/iam_adugyamfi/status/893941417697046529
"The first thing he said to me was congratulations."
Justin Gatlin says beating Usain Bolt was surrealhttps://t.co/ss8pwsyf0Q #London2017 pic.twitter.com/PuvNMWJtTv
— BBC Sport (@BBCSport) August 5, 2017
Although Gaitlin’s career has been beset by doping allegations, this act had the world in awe.
https://twitter.com/tengland150/status/893942003888685060
Photo of the night… Justin Gatlin & Usain Bolt #IAAFWorldChampionships pic.twitter.com/8hVgiNrENB
— George Orfanakis (@G_Orfan) August 5, 2017
2. Usain Bolt
Twitter has gone mad over Bolt’s loss, and they are adamant he will forever remain their legend, final world championship loss notwithstanding:
Here's an interview we're not used to seeing from Usain Bolt.#London2017 #bbcathletics #BeTheNext pic.twitter.com/LLRX2bw4fM
— BBC Sport (@BBCSport) August 5, 2017
They say lightning strikes once. Well, Usain Bolt ⚡️
struck 11 times (& counting). Thank you champ!!! #London2017 pic.twitter.com/o07Xow8pNP— Ken Chelimo (@kchelimo) August 5, 2017
Usain Bolt may have lost…….but the dude still faster than my internet.#Legend pic.twitter.com/Vv0vbRYIoD
— Castro1021 (@Castro1021) August 5, 2017
World: There's no sprinter as great as Usain Bolt!
Gatlin: Guys I kinda jus–
World: A man like no other!
Gatlin: But–
World: NO OTHER.
— Gemmar🇯🇲 (@GemJamGym) August 5, 2017
Goodbye, Usain Bolt. The fastest man who ever lived. #Bolt #aftereffects pic.twitter.com/ThnQQpbV2v
— Max Randall @combatarcade.bsky.app (@Max_Randall) August 5, 2017
https://twitter.com/UmehOMA/status/893941783851401217
3. Kelechi Iheanacho
While Bolt might be mourning his loss at the end of an illustrious career, another sports star celebrates the beginning of new things. He is one of Nigeria’s football stars flying high our flag ‘in the abroad’. He has finally signed his contract with Leicester City FC and from all indications, is happy to be there.
Thanks to all the Leicester fans for the support last night. I'm happy to be here at Leicester City, and hopefully success ahead #LCFC pic.twitter.com/3sUGsGlK0K
— Kelechi Iheanacho (@67Kelechi) August 5, 2017
4. @ziliyax
Did you catch the brouhaha that went on over Neymar’s transfer to PSG? The football world went bonkers. In case you missed it, we curated it all for you here.
Which brings us to this:
https://twitter.com/ziliyax/status/893721907857674240
Anything can happen.
5. Victor Asemota
Speaking of football, you all know that’s the way to go now if you want to make serious money, abi? So the Big Chief is enquiring on your behalf:
Do Nigerian churches have football or sports clubs that they sponsor? If not, why not? They can start from there to groom young talent.
— Osaretin Victor Asemota (@asemota) August 5, 2017
Don’t say nobody told you. Find your way to MFM or City of David and hone those skills, on your way to making mad dough.
My church does. @CODUnitedFC They also have this partnership with Bolton where they have a training camp for teens.
— Mallam Battycash (@Batarhe) August 5, 2017
They do it. COD, MFM, and a couple of others.No one beats MFM in this department sha.
— Requirement Already Satisfied (@je_mc2) August 5, 2017
@asemota so also does City of David. They even have feeder teams and a female club.
— Mark Amaza (@amasonic) August 5, 2017
For example, COD United is probably the only club in the country with a full youth set-up. Plus a women's team.
— Requirement Already Satisfied (@je_mc2) August 5, 2017
Jesu!! This is good!! https://t.co/dlTsdBrWGF
— Osaretin Victor Asemota (@asemota) August 5, 2017
Excellent!!
— Osaretin Victor Asemota (@asemota) August 5, 2017
6. Ukpaka
This is an important commentary on our political affairs:
https://twitter.com/RealBuch1/status/893861701275312128
7. Kelechi Okafor
She is an actress and fitness buff and she’s making noise about her new studio:
A snippet of my opening speech at my studio launch yesterday. Kelechnekoff Studio is now in Peckham lets get it on and poppin' ☺️ pic.twitter.com/52eUsXN6JN
— Kelechi (@kelechnekoff) August 5, 2017
When you're meant to be hosting a launch party but the music calls forth the hoe in you… pic.twitter.com/pFM7CAkwb4
— Kelechi (@kelechnekoff) August 5, 2017
Big up @ProfoundPervert who killed us all by doing a buff pole dance performance to @officialgiggs "whipping excursion" (vid soon come) pic.twitter.com/gXuMW1kKXx
— Kelechi (@kelechnekoff) August 5, 2017
Reactions:
https://twitter.com/Cherry_phoenix/status/893755575326171137
https://twitter.com/DanielleDASH/status/893764873393500161
Represent!
8. Ava Duvernay
Like Ava said:
https://twitter.com/ava/status/893872487716585475
The best thing ever.
9. Oluyemi
Nigerians are not about to let this joke go.
WATCH:
BREAKING NEWS: President Mohammed Buhari arrives Abuja airport in Grand style. pic.twitter.com/laDQMn7UhV
— Olúyẹmí Fásípè AICMC (@YemieFash) August 5, 2017
10. Mutumba
Bash has made crying girls a relationship goal, it would seem.
https://twitter.com/BashMutumba/status/893868830459650048
Reactions:
Is she dating onions? https://t.co/kKcYq3xRPa
— Chidi Okereke (@Chydee) August 5, 2017
https://twitter.com/kelvinbagwell02/status/893927453437157376
Bonus
https://twitter.com/samuelgigs/status/893820473997492224
Enjoy the new week!
