by Ifreke Inyang [@ifreke]
Hey folks, for reasons best known to the network provider we all rant about, I wasn’t able to get my BIS activated on time to get tweets from Monday and Tuesday. But trust me, when my patience ran out, I rang them up and gave them an earful! And by Wednesday, I was back on tweetville…
WEDNESDAY: @sexycalabarboy practically welcomes me back with this tweet: “Favour filled morning twinces, twincesses, twouse of twassembly tweeps, twagberos, twostitutes, twudents, twelebrities and twamebors!” Yeah, I know most tweeps think I’m a twamebor but that didn’t stop me from sniffing around! Someone else who was back, but in another location was @gbengasesan. “Hello Geneva! Good to be back,” he tweeted gleefully. “And I see the city now operates free transportation services. Free vouchers at airports and hotels.” @tharapman told a much different story of his sojourn in another city. His tweet was, “I came to Lagos in 2005 with just N10,000, my belongings and my promo CDs. I had no industry connections, no sponsors and no labels. I am a force now!” Kanayo. O. Kanayo can be regarded as a force in Nollywood, and there was some news about him. @234NEXT tweeted: “Foremost Nollywood actor, Kanoyo. O. Kanayo had declared his interest to contest in the 2011 polls on the platform of the PDP.”
@demiladeR spoke of yet another ‘project’ he was on. “Still on my quest to grow bumbum,” he announced. “I had an ice cream sundae with chocolate chips, brownies, vanilla whipped cream and hot fudge!” If you think that’s some combo, @tundeednut had a more interesting one. “Imagine eating bread with ogbono and stepping it down with alomo bitters?” @emmykeyz was definitely bitter about the electricity issues in his domain. “Why won’t PHCN just paste the rationing time tables on street light poles so everybody can copy it?” Now that one got me laughing!
THURSDAY: @deejayneptune fumed over twitter nuisances: “It is not by force to be on twitter. If you don’t understand how it works, then stay glued to facebook, hi5 or even bbm and don’t come here to tweet ish?!” @valohu was fuming over a bbm contact who sent him an annoying broadcast. “I wonder how sending an annoying broadcast msg is meant to be funny! I’m sorry you had to send it to me but I aint sorry for deleting you!” he tweeted. @divabola was caught up in a dilemma. “Ok, I really need to stop listening to dis song,” she said. “I have been warned for the second time in dis library” The song was the ‘Joor oh’ remix, featuring @iceprincezamani, @ruggedybaba, @eldeethedon and others. It was the subject of most of the discussions on twitter and it even trended as #JoorOh!
Of course, tweeps joined in the frenzy. @ryeakd – Shey NEPA dey sue generator? #JoorOh, @iskiminov – Shey o le fi klin detergent se cocaine? #JoorOh, @amanutdfan – Shey o le fi g-string shey catapult? #JoorOh, @mizzodus: Shey o le ran yahoo msgr lo soja? #JoorOh, @cookiehoolik- shey u wan use hot amala do facial mask? #JoorOh, @walegates – shey o le fi Dame Patience Goodluck se English teacher? #JoorOh
FRIDAY: @terrygdahitman allegedly had other plans for the first lady. @snn_headlines tweet read: “Terry G embarks on music-political mashup by featuring Hon. Patrick and Mrs Goodluck on the remix of Gbagaun” @ovie warned us that he would put up some new material on @notjustok and the site might just crash. @speakyourmindd retweeted and said, “Abeg, abeg, if it is not Terry G, ur website is safe. It won’t crash!” @demiladeR quickly advised us about the Terry G’s video. “Have u seen Terry G’s new video? No? Good! Don’t try it, don’t bother! Shut down ur computer! Break it if yu have to!”
@medianemesis was having issues with his Blackberry. “My trackpad failed dis morning. Now it’s working again thanks to a cleverly folded piece of paper.. but for how long?” he asked in his tweet. @donjazzymohits left us guessing how long. He confirmed a rumour that has been making its rounds on tweetville . “Hi tweeps, so everyone is asking me about Endowed remix feat. Snoop Dogg,” he tweeted. “Good news is yes, it’s true. Bad news is, today is not the release date.” There was one thing we were sure of – it was time for Halloween. “Halloween begins today,” @slankey tweeted. “Long weekend of scary stuff. Happy Halloween weekend tweeps!” @bankyW had other plans for the weekend. “I’m in Calabar dis wknd for my cousin’s wedding and @soundsultan’s album release. I’m going to wear Efik traditional outfit for the first time! Woohoo!” @tymeoutwithteea had an offer. “If your week was as busy and stressful as mine was, you better join me @tymeoutlounge tonite to relax and unwind! Don’t worry, drinks is on me..”
Yes, @tymeoutwithteea, getting tweets was difficult this week. Make sure I get the free drinks when I come, otherwise I’ll rant in my next roundup!
Gbagaun of the week: @keepupwithtito: “Keep follow my twitter. I follow you back now..”
Recommended: Who to follow this week? It’s got to be @therpervnerd. If you like people who can tweet whatever’s on their minds without fear or favour, hit the follow button on his page!
Rant of the week: Actress Tonto Dike with the handle, @tontolet: “Why would we enjoy seeing nudity in Hollywood and not Nollywood?! It’s a f**king profession peeps, grow up! I’m all put wit ma job and f**k you hard if you think otherwise! Rubbish f**king pretenders! Damn tradition my effing foot! I’ve got the mind and heart my profession requires. Period!”
Retweet of the week: Denrele Edun with the handle, @punjahpunjee tweete, asking what @goldieharvey will dress up as to a Halloween party. @goldieharvey retweeted and said “For you sake, I’m considering dressing up as Charly Boy!”
Quote my tweet: @donjazzymohits: “And for the Koko concert, if you hear anything less than 50 MoHits jamz, collect your money back!”