11 reasons why the World Cup is like parenting

by Korin Miller

world-cup-2014

Sure, not everyone is into the World Cup, but you don’t have to be a soccer fan to get into the games—especially if you’re a parent.

Here are all the ways we can relate to what’s going on right now in Brazil.

The Matching Outfits

Don’t even try to pretend that you haven’t coordinated your kid’s outfit to yours—or your significant other’s outfit—at least once. OK, you do it on the regular. You black out, and suddenly you’re all in paisley. It happens.

People Are Freaked Over Safety Concerns

Missing stadium guardrails, fan brawls, lax security: Welcome to Brazil. Outlet covers, safety scissors, BPA-free everything: Welcome to parenthood.

Fans Get a Little Out of Control

Hand-painted signs? Bum-rushing the field? Please. You did that and more when your little one had her first T-ball game (or dance recital, or whatever).

It’s Really Expensive

A seat at the final World cup game will set you back at least $455. A college tuition will set you back…we just can’t even go there right now.

Everyone Wants That One Thing. And They’ll Do Anything to Get It.

Forget the FIFA World Cup Trophy. Have you ever been at a kid’s birthday party when a petting zoo goat makes a surprise entrance? We rest our case.

Everyone Has an Opinion

The ref made a sucky call, your child will never eat his veggies/go to sleep tonight/get a job ever because you gave him a non-organic cookie–obviously. Doesn’t everyone know that?

It’s Packed With Drama

You know how players just looove to fall to the ground sobbing when an opponent happens to barely graze him? Yeah, you saw that go down last night.

There’s Always a Huge Audience

If a temper tantrum doesn’t happen in front of a crowd, did it really happen?

Good Looks Come With the Territory

Have you seen soccer players?! Have you seen my kid?!

Sh*t Gets Real In Overtime

Everyone’s running on fumes, and there may be tears (unfortunately, they may be yours). But you’re thisclose to the goal, a.k.a. bedtime, a.k.a. the moment you can kick back with a glass of vino…or just fall asleep on the couch in front of the TV.

You Have No Clue What Will Happen Next

The best you can do is hold tight and pray no one swallows a quarter.

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Read more in Women’s Health

 

Op-ed pieces and contributions are the opinions of the writers only and do not represent the opinions of Y!/YNaija.

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