Demola Rewaju: Letter from the teenage me to the present me

by Demola Rewaju

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I’m proud of you in many ways but I’m disappointed you’re no longer a progressive and you’ve taken your politics even worse by supporting of all parties PDP. 

Hey you,

It’s me, you, we or us writing from the past, your past, our past. I’m sixteen now, which means you’re twice as old as me but as you know – we don’t respect anybody. I’m also sadly half your weight and people laugh at me for being skinny – good to know they won’t be laughing at us for the rest of our lives.

It’s great to see you’re living the life I’m dreaming about – you’re writing steady and making money from it (contrary to what daddy thinks). You’ve betrayed the pen and the paper though and you now write exclusively from a laptop or smartphone – how does that feel? I like this your article explaining why you write cos I feel like Shakespeare and all the greats whenever I write with a pen. I see you’re married too! Hope your wife is all I dream she’ll be but I’m a little pissed you didn’t marry B.O. though after all these promises I’m making to her. I’m a bit of a player right now but B.O. is special cos she’s different. Now I know there’ll be another B.O. along the way but this one I’m talking about is the one you’ve been dating since primary school and you did date her off and on for over thirteen years – what happened to you? I thought that was the kinda girl we wanted? Well, you call your wife ‘Chubby Cheeks’ so I guess that part of us that likes them big is still active and kicking…you even wrote about it in this one of your articles that you titled NO PROBLEM WITH FAT LADIES. It’s great to see that all the girls that presently laugh at me will be the ones crying the most when we get married.

I’m happy you’re still as cheeky and funloving as I am and also adventurous – that side has got us into many troubles hasn’t it? Thank God we never did marijuana and you’re overcoming the addictions we once struggled with. I wish I’d read this your post about overcoming addictions at this point in my life or I won’t be still struggling. Talking of struggles – how did we cope with dad’s death? It must have been a painful period for you I know because I love him even though he can be a pain sometimes.

I’m proud of you in many ways but I’m disappointed you’re no longer a progressive and you’ve taken your politics even worse by supporting of all parties PDP. Don’t they represent all I detest? What about them in the future 2000s is so fascinating that you’re not an APC member? I can’t see what you’ve seen yet or all that you see but I wish you would go back to the Awoists.

And what happened to our great music o? Are DMX and Ja Rule dead? If not, why are you bothering with all that Fuji stuff you listen to? You even blogged about it? In my time, it’s only for razz people and I hate to think we’ve become razz. Thank God it’s not Obesere you like sha. Like Lumi says, maybe I’m just a razz boy waiting in time till my razzness comes out…do you still hear from him? I know I adore him right now and I imagine he’ll be a part of your future. What of Dayo Fasina-Thomas? Wahab Raheem? Deji Bayomi? Fola Atoloye? And all these other great guys I roll with presently? You’ve not been such a good friend I can see…but life is like that I guess.

So you misplaced this our rare copy of Wole Soyinka’s THE INTERPRETERS? How could you? So which book are you reading these days then? I see you’re still struggling with Fagunwa’s OGBOJU ODE NINU IGBO IRUNMOLE, nice to know you’ve kept our mind as sharp as possible by reading wide. And then you don’t dance anymore!!! I’m happy I’m the best breaker in the neighbourhood and I lead the school miming group at any lits we go to. That side to side shuffle you do in church is sooooooo boring abeg.

Anyway, I’ve got some tips for you which I hope you’ll not ignore even though I’m younger than you: stay true to yourself Demola and never let stuff get you down. In this my young age, I’ve fallen quite a number of times (remember when they thought we were dead after falling from the balcony all the way down?), but you must rise up after every fall and prove that life is a game that never ends until you’re dead. Be nice to the people around you and never underestimate anybody. I’m working on that side of you from here and I hope all the efforts pay off.

Also, stop that terrible hand-swipe you do over your face – it’s scary to those around you.

I’ve gotta stop here for now because I got my first kiss day before yesterday and I think I might go a little further this afternoon and lose our virginity when she comes – that girl is naughty and I’m glad you didn’t marry her. Please do reply and fill me in on the little bits of our life as it plays out – I’m only able to see sketches from where I am in the late 90s.

See you in the future! And like you always say in your Attitude! section: have a splendid week, no matter what.

Demola Olarewaju (not Rewaju *tongue out*)

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Demola Rewaju blogs at Demolarewajudaily.com

 

Op-ed pieces and contributions are the opinions of the writers only and do not represent the opinions of Y!/YNaija.

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cool good eh love2 cute confused notgood numb disgusting fail