Kay Aishida: What do you bring to this ‘ship’ called relationship? (Y! Superblogger)

Isn’t it so that the guys (and not the ladies) actually get the short end of the stick in relationships?

Why is it that in every relationship, ladies make it look like they have the short end of the stick? Especially when there’s a break up.

Just in case you don’t fully grasp this question, the truth is that I actually have more questions than answers and I may need you all to help me answer so let me start from the beginning:

A guy spots a babe ‘somewhere.’ He is smitten by whatever force it is that smites a guy when he meets a lady he likes. He locks onto the babe, men being the hunter they are, he makes his move, gets close enough to ask for her name and then gets all up-close and personal. Before you know it, he asks the lady for a relationship.

Of course, the lady didn’t see this coming (If you believe this, then you must really believe in flying elephants and you may need to see a shrink for that elephant) so you have to state your case and convince her into getting into a relationship with you.

But I must admit one thing that confuses me about the average guy… When you go to ask a lady out, what exactly do you expect from her? What needs do you feel that lady can meet?

Now let the record show here that this is the ideal world where the intentions of guys and ladies are noble and they seek the long term.

On the other hand, the lady is ‘somewhere’ minding her own business (I know this is very difficult to imagine because even in an ideal world, ladies don’t mind their business) and she suddenly starts feeling uneasy.

She recognizes ‘THAT FEELING.’

Oh yeah! It’s that sensation they feel when a guy is eating them up with his eyes and digesting them in his mind. I’ll bet you guys didn’t know.

She doesn’t even have to see you walk in but the moment you start staring at a lady with those crazy intentions of yours, even if it’s her back, her ‘Spidey senses’ starts tingling.

You can thank me later.

Anyway,what does she do? She takes a casual glance around her until she catches your greedy, salivating eyes staring… no, not staring… gaping at her. And she has a pretty good idea what you want. She prepares for you mentally and physically in most cases.

Let me cease to be graphic here. You can contact me if you want me to elaborate.

So he asks you, the lady, out and you say for whatever reason, you say, “Yes!” And from this point onwards it gets complicated.

Let’s skip the issue of marriage for now. I’m talking about being in a relationship and everything I’ve said already brings me to this major question:

What exactly is expected of a guy and a lady in a relationship?

And from there, the floodgates of questions open…

Are they to become best buddies all of a sudden and just basically hang out and hold each other’s hands?

As soon as a lady says, “Yes!”, is the totem of financial responsibility automatically passed from the lady’s parents to the boyfriend?

Is the lady supposed to show up at his place regularly to take up the domestic responsibility? Everything from doing his laundry to taking out the trash?

Is sex really a fair trade considering the fact that both parties enjoy it and there exists a school of thought that says ladies actually enjoy sex more than guys?

Isn’t it so that the guys (and not the ladies) actually get the short end of the stick in relationships?

Or is it vice-versa?

I may be wrong but I see a relationship as a kind of joint business venture so ultimately, it boils down to that simple question:

What does each party bring to the table?

I want to know what you feel about this. Who knows, some people’s orientation might just change and life’s lessons will be learnt. I want to get a response from you.

I’m waiting…


Kay Aishida is simply known to his readers as BlogAces. Predictably, his posts are called BlogAce’s Posts and he tweets @blog_aces. He writes about life generally and tries to lace it with humour. Enjoy it!


Op-ed pieces and contributions are the opinions of the writers only and do not represent the opinions of Y!/YNaija.

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