I wasn’t always a Mummy’s Girl- that’s a lie! Kind of…

My mummy was my best friend right from nursery school when we would walk from her office to my school chatting all the way. The first person who I can remember teasing me about my huge pre-adolescent tummy was my mother. She said I looked like I was 6 months pregnant. I laughed when she said it. It was funny because Mummy said it but when that horrible girl in secondary school said it too, I sulked for days! But that’s another story.

My mummy’s office was close to my primary school and there was nothing I enjoyed more than walking there after school so I could build my tiny “house” under her desk with her wrapper. She would then share my guguguru and epa which I had bought along the way or finish my lunch for me. Then I’ll do my homework or fall asleep under that desk and after work, we would head on home.

Mummy was still my favourite parent when I was in boarding school and she would give me extra pocket money behind my disciplinarian dad’s back and then give me a huge kiss before abandoning me to my fate.
Then adolescence set in and hit hard and mummy became my worst enemy. That part where she kissed me before abandoning me to the school bullies at boarding school? I started to forget the kissing part and simply could not get over the huge sense of abandonment I felt each time she and Daddy left me.

To make it worse, the disciplinarian dad died and it was just me and the mother. Oh! The wars we had! I refused to be controlled, to be told what to do! Mummy simply did not understand me! She was not making enough sacrifices for me! I could not wait to be rid of her! She was such a drag, a nag!

She wanted me to go to church every Sunday, to accompany her to crusades, to join in family prayers!

Howl!

She chased after me into the street the day I wore a belly-baring top determined not to let me expose my “bride price” too soon to prospective grooms. She barred my path and promised to cause high drama.
And whenever I screamed at her, LEAVE ME ALONE! She would scream back, I WILL NOT LEAVE YOU ALONE! I’M YOUR MOTHER!

Mummy and I are best friends again. She misses me when I am not around and will call me just to hear my voice.

“Hello”

“Hello”

“I just called to greet you.”

“Okay”

Silence. Then, “Bye”

“Bye”

That weekend, I would rush to go and see her at her house and we would smile at each other and size each other up to see if the one has gone back on her crazy diet (me) and the other is taking care of her health (her.)
I thank God those crazy years of enmity are over and that they passed soon enough without leaving any lasting bitterness between us. I thank God especially for that latter part. Now, once again, I remember those kisses more than the abandonment. And when I think of her screaming, “I WILL NOT LEAVE YOU!” all I hear now is, “I love you!”

I love you too, Mummy. And even though sometimes I still get overwhelmed and frustrated with your overbearing maternal love, you are still pretty much my best friend. The very best!

Peas Hawt!

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Onyinye Muomah is a writer, blogger and journalist who loves to explore her brain for the quirkiest scenarios. She is also an out and proud Mummy’s Girl. You can also find her on her blog Onyi’s World <http://onyim.wordpress.com/> and on Twitter @OnyiM

 

*Op-ed pieces and contributions are the opinions of the writers only and do not represent the opinions of Y!/YNaija.