by Ugochukwu Favour
When she was alive, she did not forget the birth date of every of our family member, as she called to remind us. She would call to know if any of us had wished the person celebrating a very Special Happy Birthday. During her dates, if you fail to call her, she would not hold it against you, though I will yet push to be around her, at least to show her love and loyalty of a brother.
This Sunday, she never waited to celebrate her birthday for the year, so she left us. At points, I call it betray, because it hasn’t been easy with us. No matter how we try to console ourselves, yet, echete ebewe. She used to celebrate my victories as if they were hers. She took responsibility and risk that I may be focused. I never fought some battles because she stood and fought them on my behalf.
A lot! Our mum’s heart bleeds at the reflection of your sudden death. Our dad? You need to see how weakened his heart has become, just for remembering how you died in his presence. Papa wey you dey use make mouth could not stand to stop death from taking you away. I don’t want to count more, because I need to be strong for the family; now I’m playing your role and yet play mine. And still, odirukwa easy. Responsibility yakwa. Yes as Christians, we are not questioning God whose authority to give life and death reigns supreme, but I wish to tell you that it is no longer as the normal with us.
Our Chi’s line will ring without anyone answering it. Even how you do check on me when you don’t see my posts on FB. I remember when you said, “any day we don’t see your post on Facebook, we go questioning because you like writing.” Chai!
Your brother is yet to arrive. If you feel the money you were getting from me signified how comfortable I’ve become, it’s a lie. If you think the love we shared as a family showed my larger heart, you got it wrong. You don go naa, who go carry my matter for head? Who go say I trust my brother? I don’t even know again..
A huge part of me paralyzed the very day you asked: “Will I die? Hope nothing will happen to me?” I got broken into pieces. Till today, the echo of that question is hovering. I just pray the memory we shared will stop coming. I can’t even go on memory lane again, because I’m scared that I may not make it after thinking about you.
You betrayed the entire family by accepting death. For real, nne! It’s never meant to be an option. Onwushiri ike!
Lord, may this innocent and caring soul never suffer here on earth and yet suffer in hell. Give her an everlasting life in your paradise. A very Special Happy Birthday to you, as you celebrate with God’s angels in heaven. Amen!
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