by Vera Ezimora
I have to preface this post by first saying that I am not a fan of the [former] Olori of Ife. And this is all because of that time she came to America to talk nonsense about gender equality. Yes, I’m still mad about that.
According to her, gender equality is the number one cause of divorce in Nigeria. Honestly, now that her marriage is over, the Petty Betty in me wants to ask her if gender equality was the reason her marriage ended. But I won’t ask – mostly because I cannot even reach her. But Olori, if you are ever in Maryland again, let’s talk! *WINK*
All that being said, her marriage to the Ooni of Ife has unfortunately ended. But as usual, some Nigerians have automatically dashed the blame to her – you know, with her being a woman and all. Or to put it in Nigerian lingo, some Nigerians are already fingering the Olori of Ife. Some might argue that I mean this literally.
fingerers accusers say that the marriage ended because she was previously married three times. I don’t know how true it is, but the story out there in the virtual streets is that she was first married to the former Governor of Jigawa State, Saminu Turaki. And when that marriage crashed, she got married to former Deputy Senate Majority Leader, Abdul Ningi. And when that ended, she got married to a Dubai billionaire, named Eli Khoury and changed her name to Sonia. Allegedly, as of 2015, she was still married to him, and in 2016, she got married to the Ooni of Ife.
Now, if this is all true, the only thing it proves is that the Olori of Ife likes powerful, wealthy men, and clearly, they like her back. If you have a failed marriage or relationship, it is only wise to look within yourself to see how you contributed to the demise of the relationship, so that next time, it will not happen again. If you have had two or three or four marriages end, then you really need to look at yourself to figure out what you are doing wrong.
However, the problem with this particular relationship is that some people have jumped to a conclusion and assumed that she is at fault because she has been married more than once. These people are not considering the fact that the Ooni himself was previously married (or maybe even still legally married) before he married her.
Instead of pointing fingers at the Olori of Ife because she has a vagina between her legs and is not allowed to do what men have been doing and are still doing, here are 10 reasons why you shouldn’t blame her (in the form of questions):
1. According to what we were told, the Ooni of Ife married the Olori of Ife because the ifa gods chose her for him. Were the gods not aware that she was previously married? And if it did not matter then, why does it matter now?
2. Did the ifa gods really, really pick this woman? Or did someone pick her?
3. Why is the Ooni’s previous marriage inconsequential here?
4. Did the Olori of Ife walk out of the marriage? Or was she sent out?
5. Why did the Ooni’s first marriage allegedly end?
6. Would it matter if it was the Ooni who had been previously married to three powerful, wealthy women?
7. Why is the Ooni silent?
8. Will the ifa gods pick another wife for him? If so, did they make a mistake in picking this woman for the Ooni?
9. What is next for the Ooni of Ife and the Olori of Ife? Or should I say who is next for them? And by the way, this woman is beautiful. No wonder everyone wants to wife her.
10. And most importantly for me, is she ready to change her mouth about her stand on gender equality being the number one cause of divorce in Nigeria? Because I know for damn sure that that is not what she was fighting for when her marriage ended.
Speaking of fights, I see that she has social causes where she’s travelling around and fighting against cancer and domestic violence and what not, so I suppose that she will not be beside herself ’cause she has nothing to do, now that her marriage to the Ooni is over.
The Incredible Lesson I Have Learned From This Fiasco:
I have seen many, many posts on social media about the Olori’s multiple experiences in the institution of marriage. Many Nigerians have bashed and insulted her, but I have to admit that many Nigerians have also defended and supported her. The support has been unlike that time Chimamanda dared to be a pregnant feminist – because apparently, those two things are mutually exclusive. The lesson here, therefore, is that Nigerians would rather you be a community wife than be a feminist married to one man AND pregnant for that one man.
Okay. Got it.
Op–ed pieces and contributions are the opinions of the writers only and do not represent the opinions of Y!/YNaija