Love this, Love that: The plight of a word losing meaning

 by TheToolsman

Our society is one where certain actions, phrases and words have been bastardized to levels where they mean little or nothing. I could go over a few of them but today, I’ll just go with the one currently riding my gears the most, ‘LOVE.

Yes, the world’s favourite four-letter word (no, it’s not food). Now, my opinion on this is very simple. I’ll leave religion out of it and just talk from the “worldly” perspective. Call me white or whatever but growing up, I read a lot of books and saw all kinds of movies and by the time I was 10, I knew there was more to professing love than the way it was carelessly done here.

A friend of mine once met a girl in the morning of a certain day, by evening, I overheard him saying the words “You know I love you” to her.  They had sex that evening and for the rest of that week, then he was done. Also, I couldn’t help but notice how a lot of people tried to justify things such as staying in an abusive relationships with that same four-letter word – LOVE. A lot of us say it and use it recklessly like it is just another word, right?

Trouble begins when you ask an average black man to define ‘LOVE’ in a “non-religious” context. (Yes, we’ll get to you so hold that thought.)

Before I go on, let me state clearly that in my opinion, the under listed, are very different.

* Admire

* Infatuate

* Lust

* Like

* Be “in Like”

* Love

* Be “in love”

Also, I’d like to state that when it comes to love, I have the following opinions:

1. You can love more than one person at once.

2. You can love more than one person at once but you cannot be ‘IN LOVE’ with more than one        person at the same time.

3. Once you fall ‘IN LOVE’ with someone, you can fall ‘OUT OF LOVE’ with the person but it would take a grave sin for you to completely stop loving the person.

4. Merely LOVING someone can NEVER justify certain things e.g. staying in an abusive relationship; however, being ‘IN LOVE’ with someone “might”.

From this, you can clearly see that in my opinion, being in love with someone carries a whole lot more weight than just loving someone. Your parents, siblings, friends can love you. You can love a girlfriend/boyfriend after being “in like” for so long but falling “in love”? That’s not something you just do. I’ve loved and still do but falling “in love”? I’m still waiting to experience it.

Having said all of this, I know you want my definition of being in love. I’ll give you an answer I came up with after seeing a Jude Law movie, can’t remember which though.

The scenario:

You and her are standing not too far from each other, not so far away, an armed robber fires a gun. As you watch the bullet leave the gun heading for her, your mind processes in 0.00000000000001th of a second…


Take the bullet…

Of course, you won’t take the bullet, except you’re Jesus or …

Anyways, imagine that situation and if you know your mind will process that thought, or you will actually take that bullet for him or her, then you, my friend, are ‘IN LOVE’.

That’s my definition, time for yours. Before you share your comments, please share your definition of being “IN LOVE”. If you don’t have one, no problem, use the comment box and speak your mind. Cheers.

TheToolsman is the editor of

Leave a reply

Your e-mail address will not be published.

Comments (2)

  1. It's about thinking with their arises!

  2. Any definition of love (or anything for that matter) that comes from a movie is fundamentally flawed. The concept of 'being in love' is Hollywood BS. A cop-out so you can say 'I love you, but I'm not in love with you'. If you love someone, you love them and that's that. I can take a bullet for my brothers because I love them. Love is love. You either have it or you don't.

cool good eh love2 cute confused notgood numb disgusting fail