by Jude Ndukwe

I usually do not read the output of what I consider any writer’s figment of imagination rather than on facts. But this one by Lauretta Onochie caught my eyes, not because she is the latest needless burden on our economy with her appointment as Personal Assistant to the President on Social Media, but more because her chosen headline is not only flawed grammatically but is also capable of misleading and misinforming her readers.

In her shambolic and uninspiring treatise, “Deji Adeyanju, a Product of of Pomp and Pageantry”, she chose the popular but ungrammatical phrase of ‘pomp and pageantry’ which is nothing but the creation of some fellows in Oklahoma, USA, just to sell their brand of bridal wears by making their outlet popular through an ingenuous concoction of words to sound grammatical, popular and ingrained in the minds of people as part of their sales strategy. It is this sales strategy that Lauretta Onochie, our own presidential aide, in her pursuit of vain glory, has not only fallen for, but used with reckless abandon.

When the president’s aide does not know the difference between names and words or phrases, one is not in any way surprised because as has always been the case under the current administration, the presidency is replete with people who are lazy, ill-informed and half-educated, yet, brazen in the unrestrained display of their deficiencies.

Rather than vilify Deji Adeyanju who is an unrepentant PDP stalwart, a compass to the teeming youths of our nation and an avowed critic of the Buhari administration (for the very right reasons), for whatever reason, one expects the plethora of media aides to the president to project and promote the good works of their principal. But when the presidency is bereft of any good work, the media aides, just like their Oga, descend into the vain arena of insults, curses, calumny, blame game and fraudulent claims. That is only natural!

This is the lot of the unfortunate appointees of Buhari’s aides!

The abysmal performance of their boss has given them nothing to cheer and write about but everything to jeer at others for.

But then, what else does one expect from a presidency populated by confirmed plagiarists, budget ‘padders’, WASC certificate forgers, sophists etc?

While Onochie and her likes cannot stop having nightmares about the larger than life image that has been bestowed upon former president Jonathan by the virtue of his good works that cannot be assailed by millions of Onochies and their paymasters, they keep singing the name of a man who has since left the stage for them while they were obviously unprepared to take over the role 15 million ‘voters’ have bestowed on them.

If they have forgotten their lines while on stage, whose fault is that? Jonathan has played his part, it is left for Buhari to play his, and not attempt to gloss over his gross incompetence with the appointment of media aides who are not better than him in anything.
Is there any need to remind Lauretta that the person summoned by the National Assembly to answer for plunging us into recession is Buhari, and not Jonathan because he, and not Jonathan, is the president?

Is there any need to remind Lauretta that a presidency filled with incompetent people like Kemi Adeosun who is blaming the West for her boss’ inability to utilize coal as a source of power, cannot but lead a country into depression? How did Kemi Adeosun forget so soon that on April 22, Nigeria along with 190 others and European Union signed the United Nations Framework Convention on Climate Change (UNFCCC) dealing with “greenhouse gases emissions mitigation, adaptation and finance…?

The same West which Adeosun is turning round to blame after Nigeria had signed the Paris Agreement is providing $100 billion dollars a year in aid “to developing countries (including Nigeria) for implementing new procedures to minimize climate change with additional amounts to be provided in subsequent years”. How could Adeosun not have known this? How could she have turned around to blame the same West for the gross incompetence of the Buhari administration?

At this rate, we have always known that one day, the Buhari administration would blame the angels for its inability to obey even simple court orders! This is part of what is killing Nigeria.
It is this same incompetence and fraudulent activities that have engulfed the president’s ruling party where in just over a year, many factions are already emerging from it. And that is what falsehood can cause.

When a presidency is enmeshed in falsehood as a pastime, it is only a matter of time before it shoots itself in the foot and fall apart!

From the president’s authorized biography came a line on how Professor (Pastor?) Yemi Osinbajo emerged as Buhari’s running mate in the run up to the APC primary in December 2014.

While the book as authorized by the president claimed that Buhari picked Osinbajo’s name from the three submitted to him, the Tinubu camp has come to discountenance that impression asking members of the public including one innocent Deji Adeyanju, who had no hand in such dirty fights between Lauretta’s boss and his godfather, Bola Ahmed Tinubu, to disregard the accounts in that book.

Or, should we still blame Deji Adeyanju, Lauretta’s focal point of attack and ‘unpresidential’ insults for the lies in Buhari’s authorized biography? Hear what Tunji Bello, secretary to the Lagos state government has got to say about a certain portion of the book: “I don’t know how the author came about his story, but he totally got it wrong because what he wrote basically is based on falsehood that reeks of deliberate misinformation and mischief”.

So, when one says that this is a government of sophists, fraud and mischief makers, it is a statement of fact. Certainly, Deji Adeyanju is not to be blamed for this! It is also not Deji’s fault that Lauretta’s boss mistook the serious issue of the recently concluded United Nations General Assembly for a family picnic wherein his family members went on a selfie and spending spree as if they were on a summer tour of Disney World Resort.

If that kind of essay is what the likes of Lauretta Onochie are employed for, then they are nothing but a bunch of disgrace to themselves and a monumental waste to our commonwealth from where they are paid.

Rather than look for scapegoats to vent their frustration on, Lauretta Onochie and the plethora of presidential aides in Aso Rock should seek ways of engaging themselves more meaningfully and make the best use of this rare opportunity to defend their principal in all his incompetence and deficiencies. That is the least expected of her!

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Op–ed pieces and contributions are the opinions of the writers only and do not represent the opinions of Y!/YNaija

The author tweets @stjudendukwe