Every day on the Nigerian internet, there are people who keep our eyes glued to our phone screens as we read their rants, opinions, perspectives on political and social matters, etc. Sometimes, they are just downright ridiculous. We make it our job to take down the names of these noisemakers.

Here’s our list from today:

1. Aisha Yesufu

You remember the 2 million march by the group Youth Earnestly Ask for Abacha under the direction of Daniel Kanu?

The BBOG co-convener ‘indirectly’ draws parallels with the Buhari administration.

I repeat, once upon a time in this country General Sani Abacha was seen as the only option on ground. Political parties adopted him. There was a two million man march for him. The then youth were earnestly asking for him.
Only a few could speak against him.
Good morning

— Aisha Yesufu (@AishaYesufu) February 14, 2018

Some replies:

Most of us remembered vividly that the so called two million man march was bought on the street of Naija. We watched helplessly as our future was being carted away with gold coins.This is a slap and a bitter reminder of the impact of poverty on our politics. It is still in play!!

— Efolo Richard (@efolotalks) February 14, 2018

That's y they will neva reform d educational sector.

That's y they will neva establish functional vocational/skill acquisition centers across d regions.

Without 'knowledge' our youths who shld be our national investments/assets remain impoverished n helpless.#ThingsFallApart

— The Prodigal One (@okey_echezona) February 14, 2018

Questions:
1) Where was it said that PMB is the "ONLY OPTION"?
2) When did all political parties adopt PMB?
3) Has there been a "Million Man March" for PMB?
4) Are all Nigerian Youths asking for PMB?
Let us be OBJECTIVE with our criticism please.

— GbemiOyebisi™? (@iamGbemiOyebisi) February 14, 2018

Y'all are just gassed unnecessarily. She's speaking her truth,, nah she is speaking THE truth. Curse all you want, she's noble enough to remind you that part of history." incompetence should not be rewarded by blind loyalty"

— Spiky (@spiekey) February 14, 2018

Nigeria has gone through phases over the years although with little or nothing to show for it.The Abacha era was a dark age for Nigeria.We do hope that the manipulative influences that cowed many Nigerians then,will not have their way in this dispensation.God is watching

— Emma.O Akpasubi (@AkpasubiO) February 14, 2018

2. Captain Machuka

The Captain asks to love our mothers!

You suck your mom's breasts with milk for 2 years & you haven't done anything tangible for her.

You suck your girlfriend boobs without milk for 2 weeks & you think of buying her an expensive Valentine gift.

My brother, the thunder that will strike you is still doing press ups!

— Machuka Wyclife (@Machukah) February 14, 2018

Some replies:

Very true mom's first then wives …wives please and always know that a woman took care of that hubby in order to reach u….we owe so much to our mother in love…let the boy child gift their mothers in equal measure…

— Zosky Wahu (@zosky_wahu) February 14, 2018

Your thinking is pathetic. Go marry your mother then

— David Nakome (@DavidNakome) February 14, 2018

3. Kate Henshaw

Still on the matter. A teacher raped a 3-year-old and a cconversation has started. The actress raises another issue.

Only Lagos State is serious about these domestic violence/rape cases. Others pay lip service…

— Kate Henshaw (@HenshawKate) February 14, 2018

Some replies:

Majority of the domestic violence/rape cases advocates are in Lagos. Few in Abuja and very few in Porthacourt.

Other parts of the country do not have advocates.

— Son Of Man (@chukygeorge) February 14, 2018

Most of them just come on social media to make noise and it all ends there. Sad ?

— Clara Madukwe (@ClaraMadukwe) February 14, 2018

4. Richard Mofe Damijo

“You’re complete on your own”, “Nobody completes you, nothing completes you” – those lines are Gold!

Tell us more daddy!

5. Shehu Sani

The military made sacrifices and achieved a lot in the battle against the insurgents,and that is commendable.But until the last hostage is freed and back home and until the suicide attacks stops,we can only say tremendous progress has been made but not complete victory.

— Senator Shehu Sani (@ShehuSani) February 14, 2018

6. Bisi Alimi

The human rights activist speaks after his recent visit to Nigeria.

How do one talk about Nigeria and its corruption and lack of self-awareness of its citizens and the lack of infrastructure and social amenities without sounding condescending.

My last trip has left a seriously bad taste in my mouth and a hole in my heart. I weep for Nigeria

— Ashiwaju Bisi Alimi (@bisialimi) February 14, 2018

7. Sunday Oliseh

The Nigerian football manager and former player reacts to his sack as Fortuna Sittard manager.

I confirm: Due to my refusal to participate in Illegal activities at Fortuna sittard & violate the Law,i have been Suspended from my duties as Coach by the Foreign Owners of Fortuna.Unfortunate for the lovely fans, my players & our hard fought phenomenal positioning for Promotion

— Sunday Oliseh (@SundayOOliseh) February 14, 2018

But how about the question on his man-management skills during his time with the national team?

His time in the national eam saw the sudden retirement of the duo of Emmanuel Emenike and Vincent Enyeama who both faulted the style of the erstwhile Super Eagles captain.