Every day on the Nigerian internet, there are people who keep our eyes glued to our phone screens as we read their rants, opinions, perspectives on political and social matters, etc. They range from the awesome and brilliant to the OMG, he didn’t. We have made it our job to take down the names of these noisemakers.
Here’s our list from today:
1. MMM: After the suspension that took many a Nigerian’s breath away, not to mention their plans to ‘blow’ during the holidays, the Ponzi scheme that saved a thousand lives returned today. Hallelujah, somebori. Good morning, Mavrodians.
Here are reactions from Twitter to that announcement, and our thoughts on MMM’s return on Friday the 13th.
2. Eromo Egbejule for Southern Kaduna
The reporter is in Southern Kaduna, penning down the experiences of the people living through what appears to be Ethnic cleansing.
https://www.instagram.com/p/BPGL0D9gvFR/
It’s worthy noise, this one because until recently the President hardly batted his lashes in their direction and El Rufai was busy paying off the perpetrators. See the list of crises plaguing Nigeria now.
3. Bishop Oyedepo
The good Bishop is simply fed up with government apathy towards the killing fields of Southern Kaduna, and has prayed a fiery prayer.
4. OAP Freeze
The ever noisemaking OAP could not wait to weigh in on the matter.
https://www.instagram.com/p/BPM5BOclu05/?taken-by=daddyfreeze&hl=en
5. Steve Harvey
Steve Harvey will be working with Dr Ben Carson to build American inner cities.
Steve Harvey says Trump introduced him to Ben Carson: "It was a successful meeting" https://t.co/UyqzPDTbGn
— NBC News (@NBCNews) January 13, 2017
But some black folks think it means he is in cahoots with Trump now, and therefore isn’t trustworthy.
https://twitter.com/owillis/status/820006934912892928
https://twitter.com/owillis/status/819999053761171456
https://twitter.com/iamlaurenp/status/820003887172161537
"Steve Harvey" would not make the top ten Family Feud answers for "People The President-Elect Needs To Talk To 7 Days Before Inauguration."
— Josh Gondelman (@joshgondelman) January 13, 2017
https://twitter.com/thebenshow/status/819996532644556800
https://twitter.com/williamcson/status/820002580831019013
But some people get it
https://twitter.com/brianajackson_/status/820007833869631488
I don't see the issue with Steve Harvey discussing black people with Trump. That's what influential people do. Speak for their ppl.
— Deedee Ana. 🦋 (@DeedeeAna_) January 13, 2017
6 Tonto Dikeh vs Mercy Johnson
In 2013, Tonto Dikeh insulted Mercy Johnson for resuming back at work two months after the latter gave birth to her daughter, Purity.
This is what she said
“Nollywood Bridez marry horribly** #SHEBA#…Wen n if I give birth, God plz provide mii wit a husband dat can provide 4uz,Not 1 dat wld send mii bck to actin 2monthz after I born 2Huzzle’
When Mercy Johnson responded, Tonto came back with this:
“Every1 who comes to ma tl to Rant Abt ur FOOL MJ is a bigger baztard Dan SHE is coz I never cald no Bitch’z Name**F*ck U**”
“Bitch Lozt her Name, U gonno Uze mii az A come back???Naaahhhhh go Nurze Ur Witch Bitch** #StayBlessed.”
After finding God this year, and trying to cope with what the grapevine has called marital complications, Tonto Dikeh sent out an apology to Mercy today, which the latter received graciously.
7. Gideon Okeke
The actor figured he had something to say about Chiwetalu Agu’s acting, so put it out on Instagram for all to see.
https://www.instagram.com/p/BPM-kW7hh3k/
This is what we think about it: This noise deserves an F for foolish.
